Reading post: February

It's the last day of February, so it's time for a reading post. I haven't been reading as much as usual, too much time spent absorbing the terrible news...

The books I drew from my "Briefly Noted" envelopes this month were Maps of Our Spectacular Bodies, a novel by Maddie Mortimer, described as "striking," and The Walker by Matthew Beaumont, a work of nonfiction described as "heady." But the "heady" one was awful, so I picked again and came up with Still Life with Bones by Alexa Hagerty, described as "meditative."

• Maps of Our Spectacular Bodies by Maddie Mortimer (2022). A novel about a woman, Lia, dying of cancer. I enjoy cancer memoirs, but a novel, hmm. This one is experimental, meaning, for one thing, that the cancer is sometimes the narrator. That was interesting, but also (for me) confusing. I definitely had issues with the book, but overall I'd say it was worth reading.
  
  
• The Walker: On Losing and Finding Yourself in the Modern City by Matthew Beaumont (2020). This turned out to be a collection of scholarly articles written by an English professor. I can't stand English department writing. Makes me physically ill. So, after a few pages I sent it back to the library.
  
  
• Still Life with Bones: Genocide, Forensics, and What Remains by Alexa Hagerty (2023). Oh, God, this wasn't much better. I don't know why I thought a book with the word "genocide" in the subtitle would be something I'd want to read. I mean, it was somewhat interesting, about exhuming skeletons from mass graves in Guatemala and Argentina, what the bones can tell you about how the people died, etc. But mostly it was terribly depressing. One thing: I kept reminding myself that things are better here, even with Trump. No mass graves, yet.

 

Best books of the 21st century so far

In February I decided to read books off the New York Times list by authors with last names beginning with C or D.

• Outline by Rachel Cusk (2015). When I started this, I hated it immediately. Not enough to stop reading, though, and by the time I was halfway through I had changed my mind. It's experimental writing, mostly just a bunch of conversations between the writer and other people, with the other people doing all the talking, and NO quotation marks. So it's tiring. But Cusk has some interesting things to say. I requested another book by her from the library, A Life's Work: On Becoming a Mother, and when it came in I read it too. A clever view of early motherhood, although I found I didn't relate to it totally because she had one baby and I had TWINS.
  
  
• Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates (2015). I had meant to read this for ages, just hadn't gotten around to it. I think I should have read it several years ago. His points about racism and the American Dream, in this letter to his son, are old news now. Still, it's worth reading, even now. Maybe especially now, with the all-out attacks on DEI. I keep thinking how stupid I was, back in 2020 with the George Floyd protests, to think that things from now on would be better.
  
  
• The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz (2007). I tried to read this, but I gave up after about 50 pages. I'm sure I could have gotten through it, but it wasn't making me happy and I thought, you know what, I don't have to read this.

So I've now read 37 of the books on the list of the top 100. I'm hoping to get to 50. I obviously don't want to read them all -- lots of them sound like things I wouldn't be interested in. But 50, I think I can read 50.

 

Other reading

My other reading this month consisted mainly of the book for the book group (The Incredible Winston Browne by Sean Dietrich, which was OK but not really my thing), and Less Than Angels by Barbara Pym (note that I don't own a copy with this cover, but I couldn't find a picture of my cover, so chose this one). 

For several years now I've been reading two Barbara Pyms in February, but this year I decided to go down to just one -- but to really enjoy it. And I did. It's such a funny book, especially for someone with a background in linguistics. Even though I've read the book at least a dozen times, maybe 20 times, maybe more than that, I laugh at it every time. There is a character called Miss Lydgate, an elderly linguist based on someone Barbara Pym worked with, who makes me laugh all through the book. This scene takes place in a restaurant:

Catherine wondered again as she so often did why it was that so-called 'well-bred' people had such very penetrating voices. It could not be thought, in these days, that they were accustomed to giving orders to servants. Miss Lydgate could be heard all over the room and Father Gemini matched his tone to hers.

Miss Lydgate can be heard "all over the room" all through the book. She's a lovely character and the whole book is lovely. Apparently this novel got less attention from reviewers (back in 1955 when it was published) than any of Barbara Pym's other novels, and I just can't understand why. I love it from start to finish.

There are 13 Pym books (not counting the cookbook and the diaries and all that): 12 novels and a compilation of early work called Civil to Strangers. If I read one a year from now on (and die in October of 2050, as predicted), I will only read Less Than Angels once more, in 2038. What a terrible thought. Maybe, as my end is approaching, I can read two Pyms a year, so that I get to it again. OK, that is ridiculous, we are not going to think about that.

In March I will read two more books from "Briefly Noted" and try to read two more from the NY Times list. I will also try to read my next book about Franklin Delano Roosevelt: FDR by Jean Edward Smith.

Trying to fight back

Last Monday, President's Day, to keep from dying inside due to Trump's and Musk's crazy attack on our country, I decided to attend the Not-My-President protest in Denver. Rocket Boy, to my surprise, agreed to go with me. Not like he's working or anything, thanks to Musky.

The last time I went to a protest in Denver, the bus from Boulder was jammed full of protesters and we ended up having to drive instead. I thought it would be the same this time, and so RB and I were going to drive to Golden and park there and take the light rail, and it was going to take a lot of time and be very complicated. Just before we were going to leave, I said, "I don't know, maybe we should just take the bus," and so we did, the FF1, and it was fine. Not full at all, sadly, although more and more people did get on as we went along. Mostly old people like us, which also seemed sad, but I suppose the CU students were off skiing. When we arrived, a nice city employee directed us to the free MallRide, and we took that to the Civic Center, where protesters were gathering.

It was really really cold, and also snowing slightly. We walked around and eventually found places to stand. There were speakers, but I couldn't hear a word of what was being said. Then someone fixed the sound system and I started to be able to hear. The speakers were OK. I was struck, both from the speakers and the signs of the people around me, by how many different concerns were being expressed. I was there for federal workers, of course (my sign read: ELON FIRED MY HUSBAND: ARE YOU NEXT?), but there were people there standing up for immigrants, for Gaza, for trans people, for Ukraine, for DEI, for climate change. Someone had a sign about saving wild horses. It might be easier to do this if everyone were protesting the same thing, but that's impossible because Trump is attacking so many different things at once.

After the endless speeches, they said it was time to march. So we all turned around and started marching. Rocket Boy asked me later if I had used my app (MapMyWalk), but I hadn't turned it on because that felt sort of shallow. But we walked a long way, for a long time, so I ended up being sorry I hadn't turned on the app. It was about 2 hours from the time we got to the Civic Center until we left, but I don't know how much of that time was spent listening to speeches and how much time was spent marching.

Afterwards we took the MallRide back down the 16th Street Mall, but got off at the Cheesecake Factory and had lunch there (since we don't have one in Boulder anymore). It was OK. 

We got a piece of cheesecake to go, but the kids didn't want it. They don't like cheesecake. Rocket Boy and I split it a few days later.

***

I thought I'd keep a running list of what else I did this week to protest. It's so easy to get tired and depressed and to give up. After the exhilaration of Monday I decided I wanted to do something every day. It's not that I think what I'm doing will have any effect on anything. But NOT doing anything will have even less of an effect, in fact it will encourage Trump and Musk to do ever more bad things. So I must try, I must be one of the little worker bees and worker ants, doing my little part, hoping to save the queen (of Democracy, not the false king Trump).

Here we go.

Tuesday

A few days ago I filled out a form on Reddit that was posted by a Boulder Reporting Lab reporter, asking for stories from people who had been fired or whose loved ones had been fired. On Tuesday I got an email from her, asking if she could quote me anonymously. So of course I said yes.

I also joined BlueSky, under my real name. I don't imagine I'll post much, if at all, but I'm there. (Supposedly it pisses off the Muskmelon when people join it instead of his stupid social media business.) My sister joined too.

And I emailed my neighborhood listserv to tell them about a protest happening on Wednesday. A lot of people said they would be there.

Oh, and we went to Target and while there I looked for Patriot by Alexei Navalny, but can you believe they were sold out of it? I wanted to buy it before Christmas, but hesitated to get it from Target (and Barnes & Noble were sold out). Now I try to get it from Target and they're sold out. I should probably get it from B&N, ask them to order it for me if necessary. (I refuse to buy it from Amazon, which I am currently boycotting.)

Wednesday

The Boulder Reporting Lab story was published today.

The King Soopers strike ended at midnight last night -- they don't have a contract yet, but the workers have gone back to work for now. So after breakfast I rushed off and got $80 of essentials (toilet paper, juice, cat food) that we'd been missing. 

Then I got ready to go to today's protest, which was walking distance from our house. I left home at about 11:25 and got there about 11:35 -- and there were a LOT of people there already. So fun! (I didn't take any pictures, but you can see some that were in the Daily Camera article, in my photo.) It was bitterly cold, but the sun was shining and I had taken care to wear my warmest coat and warmest gloves. I had made a two-sided sign, one side of which said "Keep the Atomic Clock Ticking" and the other side of which said "Protect the Radio Spectrum," but really, both sides were too small for people driving by to read. 

I stood around in the snow until 12:58 (the rally was scheduled to end at 1:00 pm), waving my illegible sign and my warmly gloved hands at drivers whizzing by. An amazing number of them honked and waved back! Even bus drivers, even drivers of big trucks (who you might expect to be Trumpers). It was a very positive, uplifting experience. And, oh dear, I got interviewed by a reporter for the Daily Camera (see below).

Thursday

The Daily Camera article was published today (see photo above). I won't give a link, because it's behind a paywall, but I was quoted in it.

Today I decided I would do what I find most terrifying: call one of my elected representatives. I hate making phone calls, but everyone says this is really a good thing to do, very effective. I started with John Hickenlooper, one of our senators. I liked Hick as a governor but I have not been impressed by his senatorial work. He seems to just tag along behind Michael Bennet, our other senator. I spent all morning avoiding this call, but finally I decided to do some research. Research always makes me feel better. I studied the "News" section of Hick's website and discovered that he and Senator Bennet had written a pointless letter to OPM, asking them to be kind to Colorado's federal workforce. Ha ha, as if.

But there was no mention of the fact that about 1/3 of the federal workforce are veterans, which is something that's been bothering me. So I wrote myself a little script, thanking Senator Hickenlooper for his letter but asking him to please stress the fact that all these veterans are being laid off. Veterans are given preference in federal hiring, but apparently they're just being slashed and burned along with everyone else in the federal firings. Even severely disabled veterans. What a great way to treat people who have risked their lives for you.

I called Hick's DC office, and first got a message from the phone company telling me I have to dial a "1" first. I was so nervous, I'd forgotten I was on the home phone, not my cell. So then I called back, including the "1" and got voicemail. They say you should call and call until you get a person, but I decided voicemail was fine. I left a detailed voicemail and then hung up. Hopefully they won't call me back, but if they do, I can deal with it.

Next week this will be easier.

Friday

Today I figured it was time to write a letter to the editor. I like doing this, and have had letters published in the past. So I wrote a letter (to our local paper, the Daily Camera) about Trump/Elon's treatment of veterans and sent it off. It hasn't been published yet, but I will watch for it all next week.

Saturday

For an easy Saturday task I decided to make my first post on BlueSky. I was struck by something David Brooks said on the PBS NewsHour last night (I discovered he'd also said it in his column in the New York Times). He misquoted F. Scott Fitzgerald in The Great Gatsby: "Rich people are careless. They break things." It isn't really a misquote, more of a summary, but I called it a misquote. I am very up on The Great Gatsby right now because Teen B and I are reading it together for Language Arts.

I'm sure no one will read my post. Doesn't matter. I made it.

Then I went to Barnes & Noble and finally bought a copy of Patriot by Alexei Navalny. I don't know when I'll have time to read it -- I have so much reading scheduled for March already -- but I wanted to spend the money on it (maybe some small bit of it will get back to his wife and the Resistance). His face is on the cover and I have it on my bedside table, looking at me.

Today

I decided that I could have Sunday off. The blog is all I need to write today. BUT then I read about how regular people (i.e., not feds) are writing to OPM and sending their bullet points of accomplishments (which all federal workers have been requested to do, to justify their positions). I read a post from someone in Australia who happily sent in his. So I did that too, sent from my personal email and including my real name and the agencies I used to work for. These are my bullet points:

• Attended the 50501 “Not My President” protest at the Denver civic center
• Joined BlueSky (never Twitter, or whatever it’s called now)
• Attended a local protest in front of the Department of Commerce labs in Boulder
• Called one of my senators to protest the treatment of veterans in these mass layoffs
• Wrote a letter to the editor of our local newspaper to protest same

I've got to say, I am sleeping so much better since I started doing this. When I'm lying in bed, trying to go to sleep, instead of doomscrolling through my brain I think, OK, today I tried. I did one thing to try to help. That's all I can do. Good night. And then I go to sleep.

Next week is going to be harder, because I don't have two protests to go to, and if by chance they do publish my letter to the editor, I can't submit another one for 30 days (well, I can, but they won't publish it). I can write a post on BlueSky every day, or call an elected representative every day, but I'll think about it. Maybe there are other things I can do. I'm thinking of writing a letter to Don Bacon, representative from Nebraska, to thank him for standing up to Trump.

***

What else happened this week? Well, obviously there wasn't time for much else, especially with going to multiple protests. But, you know, it was a fairly normal week otherwise, though quite snowy and cold (but that's normal for February). The kids went back to school on Wednesday, so they had just three days of classes. My book group met on Wednesday night, at Sally's. Sally and I didn't like the book (The Incredible Winston Browne by Sean Dietrich), but Lecia did.

I failed pretty badly on cooking. We had salmon with rice and broccoli on Tuesday, leftover salmon on Wednesday, and mahi mahi burgers on brioche buns with sweet potato fries on Thursday (all from Trader Joe's). On Friday I didn't even try. I picked Teen B up from school at 6 pm, after his practice, and he said, "Can we go to Starbucks?" and I said "Sure, why not" so we went there on the way home and I bought him a strawberry acai lemonade refresher. Then, as we were heading back to the car he said, "Can we get Subway?" and I thought, oh, that would be easy, so we drove over to Subway and I got him a sandwich and one for Teen A. Rocket Boy fixed himself some fish from the freezer and I had a bowl of cereal.

I'll do better this coming week. I promise.

This could be a good place for the Mounjaro report.

• Weight the morning I took my first shot: 254.6
• Weight last Sunday: 224
• Weight this morning (after 35+ weeks on Mounjaro): 224.6

So I went up a little, but it's fine. I'm still down exactly 30 pounds, which is great. And it was a funny week! Protests, not cooking... My exercise was mainly marching and shoveling. We're going to have a big warm-up this week, it's already started but it will continue for at least 7 days, around 60 almost every day. That means the snow and ice will melt and I'll be able to walk in the afternoons without wearing my spikes. So it'll be fine.

It wasn't a good writing week, except for writing letters to the editor and OPM, and BlueSky posts and whatnot. I did write a letter to my old friend Karen, I think on Friday. I haven't heard from her in so long, I keep wondering what's going on. Maybe she doesn't like me anymore. But until she actually tells me that, I'll keep writing.

This coming week I will try to write at my regularly scheduled time each day. And also do my other regular tasks -- cleaning, cooking, even genealogy. The idea is to merge my anti-Trump activities seamlessly into my life. It will get easier, maybe. I'm trying to come up with my task for the day early, do it, and call it done. Maybe even stay away from the news after that.

The thing is, the earliest anything good can really happen is in 2 years, after the midterms. And Trump will probably be in office AT LEAST until January 2029. So I've got a lot of protesting in my future. I have to figure out how to do it and still have room for my life, and also the kids' life. Must go on supporting my family, can't get lost in protesting and forget about them.

We have a few things scheduled for the coming week. Parent-teacher conferences are Wednesday night, and that's also the day I'm taking my car in. My parent support group is Tuesday morning. Teen A has an eye doctor appointment tomorrow. There may be other things I'm not thinking of.

And RESISTANCE!

Bloody Valentine's Day

OK, not really bloody. But kind of! It's a bloodbath right now, with the firings. For those who don't already know, Rocket Boy was fired on Wednesday, part of Elon Musk's attack on the federal government. Since RB was a contractor, not a civil servant, we assumed that he would be one of the first to go (even put a note about that in our Christmas letter), and sure enough, he was. He got a phone call from his supervisor at the contracting company. She told him that a lot of their other employees were also being let go. He had her on speakerphone, so I could hear her voice. She sounded really depressed. I imagine her job is next.

He went into the office late Friday afternoon to return his laptop and PIV card. He said he stopped by the office of someone he'd been working with, but it was empty, looked cleaned out. So she'd probably been fired too (she was a civil servant, but possibly probationary). He eventually found the manager and gave her the laptop. He described her tone as "dishrag like," which I assume means depressed.

On his way home from Golden he got a pizza, so that was our Valentine's Day dinner (we had been planning to have leftovers). He and I had cards for each other, and my older sister sent See's chocolate hearts. Then we watched the first half of "The Great Gatsby" (the Robert Redford-Mia Farrow version). I didn't like it, even though it follows the book closely. I thought both of the leads were miscast, no chemistry. I did like Sam Waterston as Nick, very much.

Anyway.

Where do we go from here? Rocket Boy doesn't think he can get another job, although he's going to apply for unemployment, and that will require applying for lots of jobs. The thing is, there will be lots of recently-fired scientists in the area applying for those same jobs, so he won't get them. I could look for a job, but at this point, who on earth would hire me?

We're prepared for this. First we'll see about the unemployment, and then if he gets it (not sure he worked long enough to qualify), when that runs out, we'll have to decide which of our other sources of income to tap. We both have retirement accounts, and then I could also apply for social security, though I was hoping to wait until at least age 67.

I think we need to see a financial advisor. We were planning to do that, and then we let it drop. That could be one of my tasks this week, trying to find one.

I'm a little sad about that money going away. For a few months there, we were riding high. I had a lot of ideas percolating about how to spend the money. For instance, we REALLY need a new mattress. Maybe a swamp cooler, for these hotter and hotter summers. Maybe it's time to plan a trip to Germany. You know, stuff like that. Probably not now.

It's good for me to have tasks. This week has been rough. Thursday I mostly lay around being depressed. Friday the anger kicked in, and I got a lot done: washed the towels, did all the hand-washing from the night before and also ran the dishwasher, cleaned the litter boxes, put out the trash and compost for pickup, did a stretch video with weights, paid bills, vacuumed the entire house, put away the laundry, took a 30-minute walk, put away the clean dishes, and then read for a while, ate pizza, and all that.

Whenever I feel like crying, I try to think of something else to do. Because I need to keep going. I feel as though if I fall apart, the rest of the country will fall apart too. If I keep going, maybe they'll keep going too, trying to find a way to attack Trump and the MAGAts. Of course, this is not true -- I have no control over the rest of the country. But that's how it feels.

I did do one thing today: I deactivated my Airbnb account and I put as my reason something about how their co-founder has joined the sleazy and illegal DOGE with Elon Musk. Also, before deactivating the account, I changed my Airbnb password to "ElonMuskIsAPieceOfSh*t" which Teen A pointed out was entirely pointless. Also childish. I don't care. It was satisfying. The man just had his 13th child, with a fourth woman. Why are the evangelicals supporting him?

When I told my older sister that I was quitting Airbnb, she agreed and added:

And we won’t be attending or performing at the Kennedy Center no matter how much they beg.

That made me laugh. I'm not going to be performing at the Kennedy Center (soon to be renamed the Trump Center) either. So there!

It's funny... this week, I think somewhere on Reddit, someone mentioned something called the Death Clock (you can google it). You put in your date of birth, height & weight, whether you smoke or drink, some other questions, can't remember -- and it spits out the day it thinks you will die. Now this is morbid, but for a while now I've been thinking I'll probably die soon. I'll get cancer or be hit by a truck, I don't know what, but something. Whenever I get depressed, I think, well, it'll be over soon. And then the Death Clock gave me an actual date: October 14, 2050. In other words, I'm going to live to be 90, which is actually what I'd planned for a long time, before the world started to fall apart and I started planning NOT to live that long. (I've never wanted to live to 100. 90 is plenty, I've always thought.)

I know, I know, none of this is real, it's just an AI guess. But I was struck by the 90 thing, since that was always my plan in the past. It was like -- oh god, I *am* going to live to be 90, how awful. What am I going to do now? I'm going to have to live through the endless reign of Dump, followed by the endless reign of Elon Musk. How will I survive?

Maybe this is a good place for the Mounjaro report.

• Weight the morning I took my first shot: 254.6
• Weight last Sunday: 225.6
• Weight this morning (after 34+ weeks on Mounjaro): 224

I don't know where that number came from, and I don't really believe in it. I'm now down 30.6 pounds, although it was NOT a good exercise week. Except for Friday and that hike we took last Sunday, I didn't walk at all. I did one other stretch video, I think Monday, and then I shoveled snow for half an hour on Wednesday after we got the news and also yesterday. That's it. I also ate chocolate, though no bingeing, and I tried not to eat at night. Oh, and I've also been enjoying our Girl Scout cookies. So who knows. Maybe pure anger burned the weight off.

It was just a bad week, in so many ways. I was sick for the first couple of days (the Mounjaro again), and then I got angry. I got no writing done at all. Very hard to write when you're angry, I find. I did print out all my short stories and put them in a binder, so there's that. Maybe this coming week I can write -- after the kids go back to school on Wednesday. We'll see.

It was also a bad week for cooking.

• Monday we made Mexican lasagna (Rocket Boy's recipe) which was basically an enchilada casserole. It was pretty good.
• Tuesday we had leftovers because Teen B had a concert from 6 to 8.
• Wednesday I made "Vegetable Curry" from a cookbook I'm thinking of getting rid of, called Family Vegetarian Cooking. The vegetables were a bag of stir-fry veggies from Safeway and the "curry" was a jar of korma simmer sauce. It was pretty bad.
• Thursday I made "Bow Ties with Butternut Squash and Peas" from that same cookbook, except I used campanelle pasta, because that's what I had in the cupboard. It was oddly sweet, I guess from the squash, and no one liked it. There's a lot left over.
• Friday we had that veggie pizza
• Saturday we ate out at Murphy's in Louisville, in the snow (Teen A drove, very carefully). I had mustard salmon ($26), but I just drank water, which saved us $4.
  

But writing down that list reminded me of the bright spot in the week: Teen B's concert. 

This was the "Synergy" concert, where the different musical groups play together in various combinations. I particularly enjoyed "La Bamba," which was performed by two of the orchestras, four vocalists from the choirs, and something like 9 guitar players, mostly from the jazz groups I think. The final piece was "Messa da Requiem" from Verdi's Dies Irae, performed by the advanced band & orchestra and all the choirs, very dramatic.

While listening to the concert, I reminded myself again how lucky I am that one of my kids decided to stick with music! I know, after he graduates I could still go to all the high school concerts. They're open to the public. I just probably won't, you know? Well, we'll see. In the meantime, I'm thoroughly enjoying them, and it looks like he's going to do music again next year, so I'll have one more year. 

***

So, the week ahead. This is a long weekend for the kids -- they don't go back to school until (late start) Wednesday. It's going to be cold and snowy all week -- well, not much snow, just 50% chance here and 40% chance there, probably little dustings, but the snow we got yesterday won't melt because it will be cold. It's February, what can you do? My book group meets Tuesday night and I think that's about all we've got scheduled.

Maybe I'll focus on doing better with Wordle and Connections. Actually, Wordle is OK. I lost my huge streak a month ago (I think the word was "rower"), but I'm back up to 28 now, doing fine. Connections, on the other hand, is a mess. I had a streak of 40! but now I can't solve it to save my life. Today I got exactly one category. It's the rage. Can't think straight.

I want to think about things I can actually do. Deactivating my Airbnb account was satisfying. I'm trying to think how I can divest myself from the other Tech Bros who are joining together to ruin the country. 

• Mark Zuckerberg: I don't use Facebook, Instagram, or Threads, so that's easy. Just don't start.
• Jeff Bezos: I don't subscribe to the Washington Post and I'm not going to start. Amazon is a little more difficult, because we have Amazon money saved. However, I'm going to do my best not to order anything off Amazon for the foreseeable future.
• Elon Musk: I don't have an X account, so that's easy. I might sign up for BlueSky, just because. I'm not going to buy a Tesla.
• Google: This one is harder. You'll note that I'm writing this blog on a Google account. I have my genealogy stuff in a Google doc. My nephew works for Google. But maybe there are ways to use it less.
  

Rocket Boy and I are planning to go to the 50501 Not-My-President demonstration in Denver tomorrow. We might drive to Golden and catch the light rail there. I'll see how it goes.

February considered

I thought I should think about February this week, since it's a short month and will be gone before we know it. I'm not sure I really have any special goals for February, though. There are my reading plans, of course, detailed in my Reading Posts. Following my challenge from two years ago, I should also be reading books from the stacks by my bed. I don't know if I'll have time for any of those this month, though. There's something about these 21st century books that I'm reading -- they're often depressing and hard to get through. I only read 7 books in January, and that's usually a big reading month for me.

I consider February to be a pink month, due to Valentine's Day. I already have a card for Rocket Boy, cleverly hidden behind the card for my niece, whose birthday is the 16th. I must get her card in the mail soon, after which I will have nowhere to hide RB's card. I suppose I will just turn it backwards and sideways. He won't notice it. February is also Girl Scout cookie month, but ours haven't arrived yet. My Girl Scout (the one that I order cookies from) said she will try to bring them by tomorrow afternoon.

Last year I worked on my wardrobe, and February was underwear month. My underwear situation is actually pretty good now, on account of the work I did last year. So I don't think I'll bother with that one this year. I'm still having trouble with the whole "size" problem -- like, what size am I? What size am I going to be? What size should I buy for? So I won't worry about clothes for now.

For Christmas I gave Rocket Boy three piles of coupons: for movies, hikes, and activities. He forgot about them immediately, but I've reminded him a few times, and now he's kind of into it. In January we did not take any hikes, but we watched the movie "Giant" together. I don't think we did any special activities, but we might have. My memory is a blank. Mostly it was cold and I was itchy. So far in February we've done one activity (went to History Colorado in Denver last Sunday).

We've also watched one movie together, "When the Wind Blows," but I don't know if that counts, because it was my choice. I found it on a list of "The Most Depressing Movies Ever" or something like that. I was just reading the list for amusement, not because I wanted to watch depressing movies, and then I spotted this one, which is based on a book by Raymond Briggs. I love Raymond Briggs (The Snowman, Father Christmas, Ethel & Ernest, etc.), so I requested the film from the library. Rocket Boy did NOT like it, so I'll probably have to watch another movie with him that he wants to see. For example, he wants to watch "The Egg and I," on the Criterion Channel. I also borrowed "The Great Gatsby" from the library, because Teen B is reading the book for Language Arts, so that's another possibility.

He's very psyched about the idea of hikes, so I agreed I'd go on one with him today, while the trails are in reasonably good shape (before it snows again). We drove up to northeast Boulder and went on the White Rocks trail from 95th Street to close to Boulder Creek. We only went about a mile and then turned around and walked back, so it was actually just under two miles, 1.97 miles according to my app. I could have gone farther, but my bladder was not cooperating, and there were no restrooms of any sort and no trees or other cover. I just couldn't pull down my pants in full view of anyone who might suddenly run by.

But it was a pleasant trail, very good for winter. I don't think it would be much fun on a hot summer day, although I don't know -- maybe things bloom there, hard to say. It was extremely barren today, but there were a lot of prairie dogs squeaking around. Very tame prairie dogs, actually. I waved at them all, said hello. One of them sat about two feet from me, not scared at all. Then I moved toward it and it scurried under the wire fence.

All of our 19 inches of snow melted this week, due to high winds, and we got just a dusting last night. (It really looked like someone went out with a salt shaker.) But more is coming. Monday night we could get another inch, and then Tuesday night is when it's really going to hit: a 90% chance of something (they're not giving an estimated amount yet) and a low of 10. Of course, Tuesday is the night of Teen B's next concert, which is called "Synergy," because all the different musical groups play things together. Orchestra with band, choir with jazz combo, that kind of thing. I like "Synergy," but I know I'm going to be sitting there thinking about snow. Maybe it won't really get going until after the concert. In any case, Rocket Boy will be sitting in the auditorium with me, and he can drive us home.

I'll stick the Mounjaro report in here, just to have someplace to put it.

• Weight the morning I took my first shot: 254.6
• Weight last Sunday: 226.2
• Weight this morning (after 33+ weeks on Mounjaro): 225.6

I thought I would gain this week, so that little jump down was a pleasant surprise. I'm now down exactly 29 pounds, which is about 11% of my starting weight. 

It was a good exercise week: I did something every day. Last Sunday I walked around the museum, Monday I did a stretch video, Tuesday I took a 28-minute walk, Wednesday I did a stretch video and took a 30-minute walk, Thursday I took a 29-minute walk, Friday I did a stretch video and took a 29-minute walk, and yesterday I took a 28-minute walk. (And of course today the hike.) This coming week will be more difficult, with cold and snow, so I'll just do the best I can.

I had a little bit of a scare this week, when I sampled some of the Valentine's candy I'd bought for the living room candy dish. I ate a Hershey's heart -- and it tasted good! OMG, I respond to chocolate again! This was terrible news. What happened? Is the drug not working anymore? But fortunately I had just checked out a book from the library called The Ozempic Revolution by Alexandra Sowa and it gave me the answer. Apparently many of the weird side effects of GLP-1 drugs -- like making me not respond to chocolate -- go away after a while. The drug still works, your blood sugar stays low, but some of the more magical effects go away. And also the less magical effects, like nausea and diarrhea (still waiting on that one). Now, I probably need to go up to the next level of the drug, 10 mg, and I'm going to ask my doctor about that when I see her in March. That'll probably bring all the side effects back for a while. But this is what I have to look forward to eventually. I'll be able to enjoy chocolate again -- and I'll have to put in some effort to keep myself from bingeing on it.

Maybe. After I ate that one heart, I ate a few more, and then I stopped. And I haven't had one in two days. And I don't particularly want one. Today I had breakfast and Starbucks, I took that hike, I ate some lunch. I'm not hungry. But also I'm not eating more hearts because I'm trying to do the right thing. That's what you have to transition to when you take one of these drugs: doing the right thing via food and exercise because you want to be healthy, not bingeing on dieting and then bingeing on cheating and making yourself crazy. The drug is still helping with that, filling me up and making me less psycho.

It was a decent cooking week too, which probably helped.

• Monday we had Brenda's sticky tofu, rice, and salad
• Tuesday we had salmon, rice, and broccoli
• Wednesday we had broccoli cheddar quiche (made with the leftover broccoli) and salad
• Thursday we had corn & red pepper chowder with garlic bread
• Friday I was going to make a Chinese noodle dish but I realized I was missing a crucial ingredient (Chinese sesame paste, which King Soopers didn't seem to have). So instead we had P.F. Chang's sesame chicken from the King Soopers frozen food section, which I'd bought on a whim, with rice and salad. Rocket Boy was horrified: "We're having chicken?!" but the twins were delighted and ate it all up. Teen B in particular loved it. "Can we have more of that stuff?" he asked me. I admitted that P.F. Chang's is in fact a chain restaurant and there's one at Flatirons Crossing. So...
• Saturday we ate out at P.F. Chang's. And it wasn't bad. We'll have the leftovers tonight.

This coming week will be more difficult, for multiple reasons. First, King Soopers employees are on strike. So I'll have to shop at Safeway, which doesn't have everything I want, probably supplemented by Sprouts and maybe other stores. Second, the snow and cold. If I shop tomorrow, which I should do anyway, the snow won't have started yet, so it should be OK. But still, Safeway. And it'll be cold. Then Tuesday we've got the concert, so I don't know what we'll do about dinner. Thursday we're going to Teen A's conference at TEC at 5:30, so dinner will have to be something easy. 

I guess it's not that big a deal. Dinner will be fine.

I'm avoiding talking about the big topic of the moment: the political situation. Last week I got so upset about it that I had trouble sleeping, just so angry. So I put myself on another politics news break. As Rocket Boy and I were driving to the trailhead today, we were listening to NPR and I got so upset I asked him to turn it off. I wanted to open the car door and jump out, at 50 mph.

But I'm thinking about doing something this week that's been heavily recommended: making phone calls to my elected representatives. That would be Senator Michael Bennet, Senator John Hickenlooper, and Representative Joe Neguse, all big liberal Democrats and on the right side of everything I believe in. But it's still supposed to be important to call them, because Republicans are probably also calling them and yelling at them. I don't want to. I hate making phone calls. The Reddit post I read said you should call all three of them every day. I'm thinking maybe I could call one of them each week. Maybe.

Maybe if I call one of them on Wednesday (when I'm supposed to be calling dentists), that would make it easier to call dentists. This past week, I called Hoshi Motors on Wednesday to make an appointment for my car, because I've been putting that off too. I didn't then go on and call dentists, but I did sit down and do some more research on dentists. I now have a list of four good dentists to call. Maybe I could call one of them on Wednesday and also call one elected representative.

Wednesday is a long time from now.

Other than Wednesdays, my new schedule is going pretty well. Oh, but there is one problem! I heard from our tax person last week, which means that "Paperwork day" (Tuesday) is now officially "Preparing for taxes day," which meant that I freaked out and did nothing. It's so ridiculous. I'm going to try again this week. We got two W-2s in the mail this week, which will help.

Genealogy day (Thursday) is my favorite. I look forward to it all week. So far I'm not doing much research, I'm just entering the information I have on my various relatives into my tree. Since I know a LOT about my ancestors, there are hundreds of people who need to be added. I just work along for an hour, putting people in, and then reluctantly stop.

And I had another fun writing week, even though Teen B was home sick the last two days, interfering with my writing time. I kept thinking about Anne Tyler's essay, "Still Just Writing": 

"After spring vacation the children went back to school, but the dog got worms. It was a little complicated at the vet's and I lost a day. By then it was Thursday; Friday is the only day I can buy the groceries, pick up new cedar chips for the gerbils, scrub the bathrooms. I waited till Monday. Still, that left me four good weeks in April to block out the novel."

I mostly worked on my short story collection, moving things around and tinkering with wording. I decided to print them all out and put them in a binder, so that I can look at them, but then our printer decided to break. Rocket Boy is trying to fix it now. We'll see.

OK, that's probably enough for this week. Nothing much going on, except for the world falling apart. How can I help? I've got to do something, I can't just watch it happen (or not watch it, because I can't stand it). Maybe I'll make that phone call. What are you doing?

Groundhog day

Yay, Groundhog Day. We took our Christmas tree down yesterday, right on schedule. Just need to carry the boxes and bins down to the basement. It's sunny here, which I believe means 6 more weeks of winter. But it's supposed to get to 63 today and then stay in the 60s all week. Tomorrow is supposed to be *67*. Hardly winter. I hate to think what summer will be like this year.

I liked "Sally Forth" today. Ted has a dream that they get their own groundhog. It looks within itself and predicts six more weeks of patchy fog.

I have to laugh at something. The news is so terrible I'm screaming inside (and outside, periodically). My anger right now centers around two things, although there's always something new to be mad about.

1. What the Muskmelon is doing to the civil service, i.e., breaking every law possible, destroying decades of tradition, ruining people's lives -- both the people in the civil service and the people that the civil service helps, which is practically everybody. For example, the VA -- staffed mainly by veterans to help veterans. And hardly anyone seems to be noticing this. I keep reading articles about how civil servants were offered 8 months pay without having to work. Don't people realize that is a con???? And the letters being sent to civil servants from the new Musk-controlled OPM are so nasty, so condescending. Rocket Boy got one, even though he wasn't supposed to, being a contractor. It was horrifying. The letters were titled "Fork in the Road." Rocket Boy calls them "Fork in the Back."
   
   
2. What the Dump and the Muskmelon are doing to trans people. They're especially going after trans women, claiming that they're a threat to biological women. Have you ever met a trans woman? They're not threatening. The person RB has gotten the most help from at his agency is a trans man. Also not threatening. But they are being attacked on all sides. Apparently one of the Muskmelon's kids is trans, and he finds this so upsetting that he is hellbent on ridding the world of trans people. What a guy (or whatever he is).
   

Probably the next thing is going to be NPR and PBS. I read that the new Dump-toady FCC commissioner has been asked to investigate NPR and PBS for treason. I don't think they'll be funded much longer. I wonder how long they can survive without funding.

We (that is, my family and I) are in an interesting position regarding the mess that is unfolding. Rocket Boy is a contractor for the federal government, having retired from same in October. So we think we are safe, sort of, for now. But it's like the people who voted for the Leopards Eating Faces party and then were upset when the leopards ate THEIR faces. We didn't vote for this party, but we thought we were relatively safe from them -- but they might eat our faces anyway. (They might eat YOUR faces too.) To wit:

1. We don't know how long Rocket Boy's contract might last. The paperwork he signed says he can be fired at any time, but that's by the contracting agency. We don't know whether the government can cancel the contract at any time. This isn't a huge worry, more like something to watch, because we know the contract will end at some point.
   
2. Rocket Boy is currently receiving social security payments, as are the twins. (I'm hoping to hold off at least 3 more years.) The Dump says social security won't be touched, but the Muskmelon has control of those computers now, so it's anyone's guess what could happen. Also, social security is managed by civil servants. If too many of them leave/are fired, who will do the managing? Things could go wrong.
3. Rocket Boy and I both have TSP accounts (Thrift Savings Plan). The TSP is managed by the Federal Retirement Thrift Investment Board, an independent agency composed of federal employees. If they are fired/quit, who will manage our money? The Muskmelon?
   
4. Rocket Boy's brother receives disability payments and is on Medicaid. He is 72 years old and has schizophrenia. What will happen if the Dump and the Muskmelon cut his eligibility/money? He has been ill recently, went to the hospital again on Friday, is in a lot of pain. Maybe he'll die before things get really bad. Or maybe they'll cut him off right when he needs a lot of medical attention.
5. That's all I can think of right now, but it's probably not everything.
   

So, in other news, the new tariffs kicked off yesterday. You know, when I was reading some of my presidential biographies -- Cleveland, McKinley, Benjamin Harrison, around in there -- they kept talking about "The Tariff." And I didn't understand it. I kept writing about that -- what is "The Tariff"? Eventually I kind of began to understand, and what I learned from those books was that "The Tariff" is a BAD thing. People always want tariffs because they think tariffs will protect them. But tariffs don't protect people, they hurt them.

The Dump apparently didn't read the same books I did. Or any books, more likely. OK, so his advisors didn't read the books I did.

So now we have "The Tariff" once again (I know, we've always had tariffs, but now we REALLY have tariffs). I am just praying that Canada and Mexico don't capitulate. I don't care what China does. But Canada and Mexico are our FRIENDS. You don't do stuff like this to your friends. I desperately hope Canada holds strong. Also Denmark, which may impose its own tariff on Ozempic to prevent us from stealing Greenland.

That looks like a good lead-in to the weekly Mounjaro report (which is not made by a Danish company, however).

• Weight the morning I took my first shot: 254.6
• Weight last Sunday: 226.8
• Weight this morning (after 32+ weeks on Mounjaro): 226.2
  

Yep, back down to the weight I was two weeks ago. So, basically staying the same for three weeks. Which is fine! I'm very happy with this. This week I stopped taking hydroxycine, which was making me crazy, and I got some exercise -- not enough, 5 days out of 7 (too much ice on the sidewalks), but not bad.

I also keep track of what I weigh from month to month, comparing my weight on the first day of each month. So from that perspective we have:

• June 1, 2024: 257.8
• July 1, 2024: 251.4
• Aug. 1, 2024: 244.4
• Sep. 1, 2024: 239
• Oct. 1, 2024: 237.4
• Nov. 1, 2024: 229
• Dec. 1, 2024: 231
• Jan. 1, 2025: 228.8
• Feb. 1, 2025: 226.2
   

That graph (i.e., the graph that would exist if you plotted these points) makes me very happy. I'm still aiming for a pound a month, so we'll hope for 225.2 on March 1st. Or less.

What else can I talk about? My prurigo nodularis is improving, finally. I stopped taking hydroxyzine and switched to generic Zyrtec, and that finally seemed to make a difference. Not 100% -- I've learned that there are things I still have to be careful with. For instance, my legs must be completely dry before I go to bed. No lotion. I can put lotion on during the day, but it must be absorbed before I go to bed. If my legs are at all damp, they rub against each other when I lie on my side and irritate each other. I had one really bad night this week, and that was a night I put lotion on my legs.

I still wake up in the morning and scratch. But it's much better. My legs still have bumps all over them, but the bumps are receding into the skin. I don't think I'll ask my doctor for an antibiotic. I think I'm going to be OK.

So it was a pretty good week, despite getting furiously angry about what the Dump is doing to the country. I read updates from federal employees on Reddit, get searingly angry, and then have to put the phone down. I know it doesn't do any good if I get so angry I make myself sick. But I need to keep track of what's happening, in case there's something I could do in response.

***

I cooked all five days this week, instead of having Rocket Boy cook a couple of nights. He likes to go swimming at the end of the day, come home just in time for dinner. I approve of this, because it helps his bad leg and makes him sleep better. Also, I just felt better this week, so cooking was OK.

• Monday we had salmon, rice, and broccoli (that's getting to be our standard Monday dinner).
• Tuesday we had turkey, cranberry, cream cheese, marmalade & lettuce sandwiches on mini croissants (sounds weird, but it's yummy).
  
• Wednesday we had Grandma Peg's goulash (made with fake meat) and salad.
• Thursday we had bean & cheese quesadillas and salad.
• Friday we had a recipe called "Mango Burrito Bowls" with canned peaches substituting for the mango, because RB is allergic. They're made with tofu and peanut sauce.
  

There is a possibility that Rocket Boy will have to start commuting to Golden to work -- if the dictate that government employees have to go back to the office includes contractors. If so, I'll be the five-days-a-week cook. I think I can handle it.

***

I also did a lot of writing this week. I'm still getting used to my new schedule, the idea that I must sit down and write from 2 to 3 pm every weekday. But it's becoming a habit. This week, instead of going back to my novel, I continued working on my memoirs. I've been having trouble getting started with writing about junior high, but this week I just plunged in and kept going. And the memories started coming back. In elementary school, my memories are mainly connected with my family, all the drama that was going on there. But in junior high, my memories start to be more about school and relationships with my peers. 

In 8th grade I was in a team-teaching situation that brought me a lot of misery. Going back into those memories was hard, but good for me, I think. I remembered a girl on the team who I was fiercely jealous of at the time. I googled her and (I think) found her in southern California, a failed lawyer, very unattractive. In other words, not someone to be jealous of anymore.

The novel I'm trying to write (the 2nd in a series) features two main characters who are 10 and 12 (the 12-year-old takes center stage in this novel). It occurred to me that it's probably good that I'm trying to remember what those years were like for me. It might make my novel more honest if I can really remember what it's like to be that age.

So maybe this week I'll go back to the novel. I think my characters (see photo) are looking a little annoyed with me, like, why doesn't she get busy and write our story??? But at the end of the week, Friday, I started looking at my short stories again. I was thinking about how one thing I might do someday is self-publish a collection of short stories. I read through what I have collected so far, made a few tweaks, and then remembered a story I haven't written yet but would like to. So maybe I'll work on that this week.

The bottom line is that I'm writing and enjoying it, even while the world is burning down around me. I think it's a good thing. You have to do both -- live your life and fight against the bad stuff. I just don't know what I can do to fight.