Sunday, December 26, 2021

After Christmas

Whew, made it through Christmas! I wish it didn't seem so difficult, but each year we do get through it. I think it always surprises me, as we approach the 24th and 25th, to remember that I am responsible for the celebration -- I do almost all the shopping and cooking and planning and organizing -- and so I cannot sit back and enjoy it. I have to stay busy making it all happen. You'd think I'd remember that, after 13 years! Because it's really only since we had kids that it's been like that. When it was just Rocket Boy and me, we did it together and we just had to make ourselves happy. Most years we went to California to be with my mother, and even though I helped her with dinner preparations and all that, she was still the point person, the responsible one. I truly did not understand how much responsibility falls on the mom until I became the mom.

If you do not like to be the responsible one, you should probably not have kids. But those of us who didn't realize what was involved manage to do the work anyway, more or less. 

It's getting easier, though. Although the twins did not help much, they complained less -- which is a big help. And Rocket Boy helped. I wanted him to fix our poor falling-apart tree with its five missing branches, but he said he couldn't really do it without taking the whole thing apart, so we agreed to have a rather sad tree this year. No straw stars -- the cats love to rip those apart, and since they were destroying so many ornaments already, it seemed better to skip the stars this year. They (I say "they" but I think it was mostly Merlin) destroyed two of my teasel ornaments -- ripped the teasel heads off the cloth bodies and tore them apart. I keep finding little teasel fragments. Bad cats.

Because we didn't fix the tree, the extra Christmas boxes stayed in the living room for people to trip over. Not that that makes any sense. As I type this, I'm thinking -- why don't I just put them on the patio? Maybe I will tomorrow. Right now we're so sick that we're just not coping very well.

Oh yes, illness! Nothing says Christmas like a bad cold, which may of course be Covid, omicron variety, since apparently it cares little for vaccines, even boosters. Teen A got it first, and I thought I was going to resist getting it, but a couple days after Rocket Boy arrived, he came down with it, and so did I. I have a much milder case than he does -- just a little congestion, tiredness, a bit of a headache, a very slightly scratchy throat, some dizziness, all these weird tiny symptoms. But Rocket Boy is truly sick and has been for the last three or four days. He woke up sicker today than he has been any of the other days, so since the Covid testing station at Stazio was open, we drove over there to get our nasal passages swabbed. And got into a terrible long line that we spent two hours in! I've never never never seen it like that. I've never had to wait more than about 30 seconds. Just drive up, they swab you, and you drive off again. This time the line started right after we turned off Valmont onto Butte Mill Road. I googled it, and we were in line for just over one mile, in a circle. A very slow line. Two hours to drive one mile. I was glad we had enough gas (and I had used the restroom right before we left).

Of course, on Christmas Eve I put together two plates of cookies and Rocket Boy delivered them to our next-door neighbors -- and hugged the one to the east who hasn't been vaccinated. She is convinced that she is immune because she thinks she had covid back in January 2020, even though there was no testing available back then and later she tested negative for antibodies, and anyway, having covid once doesn't prevent you from getting it again. Well, we'll see. She had a rather lonely Christmas because most of her relatives refused to visit her on account of her anti-vax attitude. And maybe now she'll get sick! But we probably don't have covid, so she probably will be fine. Her mother lived to be 103 and I think she has the same good genes. We love her even though she has these impossible political beliefs.

Last year we didn't have a main dish for Christmas dinner, so we remedied that this year. We had swordfish for Christmas Eve and a honeybaked ham for Christmas dinner. Despite feeling a little sick, Rocket Boy procured all that on Christmas Eve day (plus a coffee cake, plus rolls), which I appreciated enormously.

I looked back at last year's post-Christmas blog and there was a lot of stuff in it about being a little cross with my family for not getting me anything. I noted that I hoped they would do better this year. Well, they didn't. In addition to all the presents for the twins, I had several presents for Rocket Boy to open: two nice shirts from Lands End, a book called Haunted Warren Air Force Base, a package of lifesavers candy, and a package of wintergreen candy canes. He had nothing for me except two cards, signed by him and the boys, with nothing in them. He had also brought a couple of boxes of candy for everyone to share, which we put under the tree. 

The twins, at the last minute, decided to give some joke presents. They asked me for some boxes -- I came up with a couple of shoeboxes -- and proceeded to wrap up some things they found around the house. For instance, I received a package of toilet paper that I had bought at King Soopers the week before. 

This all sounds kind of bad when I write it down, but it was actually fine -- and funny (the toilet paper). I had ordered myself a couple of things (a Hermione doll and an extra outfit for her) off eBay right before Christmas, and I put both boxes under the tree and opened them when it was my turn to open a gift. The Hermione doll was originally sold as "Wizard Sweets Hermione" back in 2001. I had found "Wizard Sweets Harry Potter" at a Twins Club rummage sale several years ago. I didn't know he was Harry Potter (he was missing his glasses) until I found a picture online. I use him as a little brother to my Barbie dolls. He's smaller than a Stacie but bigger than a Chelsea. Anyway, when I was Christmas shopping at Grandrabbits toystore this year, I noticed that they carried a type of doll called Lottie, and clothes for her. I studied the clothes and decided that they might fit my Harry Potter. So I bought a set of pajamas, and sure enough -- they're slightly small, but they fit pretty well (he's wearing them in the photo, along with his pirate hat from Halloween; it's still Halloween in my Barbie world, for complicated reasons). My brain went click click click and I thought: if I found a cheap Hermione, maybe I could get her some Lottie clothes! And there on eBay was a cheap Hermione (cheap because she's used, no box and her stockings are a little dirty) and I also found a cheap Lottie outfit, a spring dress and sweater (next to her in the photo).

A happy Christmas to me -- and no one but me could have found those things, or known that I wanted them, or anything like that. So I was fine with doing my own shopping!

Now the living room is a dreadful mess. It seems much worse than usual. This is probably mostly because we've been sick, although the tree boxes that should have been put on the patio and the cat tunnel under the coffee table aren't helping either. I haven't had the energy to go around collecting the gift bags and folding up the tissue paper for re-use. Rocket Boy and Teen B just finished the puzzle that you can see on the card table that's sitting on top of the coffee table, but they're missing two pieces which obviously have fallen off into the mess. We're going to look for them later, very very carefully.

I think I had other things to talk about in the blog (such as Kwanzaa, which we haven't started celebrating yet, maybe tomorrow), but it's getting late and Rocket Boy wants me to come watch the rest of a movie we started last night -- On Her Majesty's Secret Service, not exactly a Christmas movie, but it's OK. We have the rest of the week together -- he's scheduled to fly back to St. Louis on New Year's Day -- and I'd like to enjoy all of it together.

Sunday, December 19, 2021

The week before Christmas

We've reached the last week! I feel as though it got here awfully quickly, but then it always does. And now it's the time when I really want to sit back and savor the season -- but that's impossible, because there's still so much to be done. It's always like this. Why is it always like this? Because at Christmas you have to do all your regular stuff PLUS all the Christmas stuff, and there just isn't time. Nor do I have the energy.

It's 2:10 pm as I am starting this post, and I was planning to make another batch of cookies today. I've only made three so far (see photo), and my gut tells me I need to have six for it to really be Christmas. I should make a batch today, one on Monday, and one on Tuesday. Then we can make fudge on Wednesday or Thursday, and Christmas will be complete.

I know that's kind of nonsense -- but it's also kind of not. Christmas is all about ritual, and for me making cookies is a crucial part of that ritual. So I must continue on. I just cleaned the kitchen and started the dishwasher, so everything's ready for me to make batch #4.

I decided that the twins were going to help with the cookies this year, and so far they kind of have. I made the M&M/sprinkles cookies by myself when they were in school on Friday, and I made the panocha squares yesterday afternoon after they'd gotten tired of helping. But they were actively involved in making the candy cane cookies, and they keep asking me when I'm going to make today's batch.

When we started making the candy cane cookies yesterday, Teen B asked me what we do first, and I said, well, read the recipe to me. So he read, carefully, "Sift 2-1/2 cups sifted flour and 1 tsp salt. Mix together. Divide dough into 2 parts."

I said, "No, you skipped the beginning. Read the whole recipe."

He said, "That's where it starts."

I came over and looked at the recipe. Sure enough, my mother's recipe for candy cane cookies gives no information on how to incorporate the "shortening," powdered sugar, egg, extracts, and vanilla. "Well," I explained, "when you've made enough cookies in your life, you'll know how almost all of them start. You cream butter and sugar, add the egg and flavoring, and then mix in the dry ingredients."

"Sure," said Teen B, rolling his eyes. "I believe you."

I was quite amazed by that recipe, which I've been making for 40 years. It has a lot of additions in my handwriting, but I never bothered to add anything like "cream butter and sugar," because I didn't need to. When you compare this recipe to the kind of thing you find on the internet these days, with agonizingly detailed instructions on how to perform every step (because, presumably, people don't know how to cook anymore), well, hmm. What can I say?

***

I'm back. I took a break and made the dough for the next variety (eggnog cookies) and now I'm baking the first batch in the oven. They bake for 12 minutes, so I will go back and forth. This will probably lead to a jumbled blog post, but I'm sure it's fine.

This past week I had planned to finish my Christmas shopping, and I think I mostly did. On Friday I still had this angsty feeling that I needed to go out and spend more money, more more more, but I carefully stayed home instead. I usually pay bills on Friday and after looking at the current state of my credit card I decided that I could be done with shopping, for now. It isn't really the shopping that's caused the financial distress -- Rocket Boy's plane ticket to come home (Tuesday night!) was $643 and I spent $567 repairing my car (it was due for its 150,000 mile checkup) and I donated $255 on Colorado Gives Day and then there was our post-Thanksgiving trip to Cheyenne, plus we've been eating out too much. Compared to all that, the shopping was nothing. But I still have to pay off all of it, so I can't keep shopping!

***

OK, batch #2 just went in the oven. Batch #1 looks pretty good, cooling on wire racks.

We had a "high wind event" on Wednesday, that I found rather terrifying. I suppose it was the scenes of devastation from the tornadoes in Kentucky (and quite near Rocket Boy, in Missouri and Illinois!). Also, I remembered the high wind event in Utah -- was it this summer? last summer? -- when all those big trees were uprooted. Anyway, I was worried, more than I usually am. We have such big trees, and the Siberian Elm in particular likes to drop its branches. 

It was a scary day (see photo of the wind speeds up at NCAR, which is just above us on the hill), but we never lost power (though many of our neighbors did) and we didn't have any damage. There are some branches down in the backyard that I should take a look at (or leave for Rocket Boy to take a look at), but I don't think anything happened to the roof. I sound so sure of myself. Maybe I should go outside and look at the roof. It's only been four days since the wind event.

OK, I looked. The roof is fine. There's a large branch down in the yard, maybe 8-10 feet long, but it didn't fall anywhere near the roof. It's almost like the tree dropped it there on purpose, knowing that we would be sad if it destroyed our roof.

There is damage in the neighborhood. One house that I walk past almost every day on my walks lost its fence -- just fell over into the yard. And I heard about another neighbor who had a tree fall on their house. I'm sure it didn't mean to. 91-mph gusts of wind are hard on trees.

***

OK, third and last batch is in the oven. The recipe doesn't make a lot -- I ended up with 43 cookies total -- but they still have to be frosted, so they're complicated. Complicated recipes shouldn't make too many cookies, otherwise it would be too exhausting.

Tomorrow the kids and I will do sugar cookies. That's exhausting.

Something occurred to me last night: it's a week until Christmas and I have yet to read a Christmas book! The only exception is the kids' bedtime book: we're reading something we found in a Little Free Library called The Dog Who Thought He Was Santa. It's OK, better than I thought it was going to be, even though every other chapter is narrated by the dog. We'll try to finish it up in a few days and then read Christmas picture books like we did last year.

But for my own reading, not a Christmas book in sight. My last eight books have been as follows: the book group book, a biography of Rutherford B. Hayes, my last Classics Challenge book, and five serious non-fiction books. I don't know why I am so focused on non-fiction right now. Normally I don't enjoy it very much, but this year I've just kept reading it. Depending on what you count as non-fiction, I finished my 37th (or 38th, or 36th) nonfiction book this afternoon. For me, that's a lot. It was my 127th book of the year, so OK, that's a lot of fiction too (90 books, hmm). But when you figure a lot of the fiction was books I read to the kids and books for the book group and books for the Classics Challenge -- out of the other books I read, I really did choose to read a lot of non-fiction. For me.

The book I finished this afternoon I didn't love. It was called The Sweet Spot: The Pleasures of Suffering and the Search for Meaning by Paul Bloom. It's popular at our library right now -- I had to put a hold on it and wait for it. What I can't remember is WHY I did that. Where did I hear about this book and why did I think I wanted to read it? I feel as though it has something to do with another book I read recently, The Second Mountain: The Quest for a Moral Life by David Brooks. Which I did not like, but I think it might have led me to this book, which I also did not like. I mean, it was OK. Just didn't really blow me away.

So here's the thing. Both books were OK, not terrible, though I didn't feel particularly enlightened by either one. But both of them were written by men around my age (Brooks is 60, Bloom is 57) who have recently divorced their first wives (around their age) and the mothers of their children, and are now with much younger women, who they claim, in their Acknowledgements sections, have made their lives fabulous. Brooks' new wife is 37 (today, oddly), Bloom's new "partner's" age is unknown, but she's an assistant professor and as recently as four years ago was a grad student (his grad student), so I'm guessing early to mid 30s?

It's hard for me to pay a lot of attention to the blatherings of men my age who have just had midlife crises and come out on the other end with hot new women. I just don't trust their insights, somehow. I'd rather hear from their ex-wives.

***

I got the kids to take a walk to the park/school with me, so we've had a little exercise today (not a lot, but it's OK). It wasn't too cold today (better than yesterday, which was frigid). There was almost no one out walking, though, which seemed strange. I guess people are either busy with Christmas prep or they're out of town. The students are gone -- off to their hometowns to catch or spread Covid. 

I should make some plans for the week ahead. Two more batches of cookies. Rocket Boy arrives very late Tuesday night (I think his plane gets in around 11 pm, so I'll pick him up at the airport). We could go to a movie one of the days, but I don't know if we will. I need to do a lot more cleaning and Christmas prep. I still haven't repaired the tree, so I haven't finished decorating it either. And there are boxes in the living room that shouldn't be there. Also, I should clean the bathroom. Sigh. That might not happen.

Oh, I know one other thing I was going to mention! I had a little bit of Christmas magic today. I've been feeling for the last few days as though there is a presence in the house -- OK, I know this is nonsense, but food items keep jumping off shelves, things like that. A few times I've said, out loud, "Stop that," though I don't know who or what I'm speaking to. Anyway, today I was doing the kids' laundry and I dropped a shirt on the floor, on its way into the washing machine. I bent down to pick it up and underneath it was this pink sock.

And the thing is, I know the pink sock was not on the floor before I dropped the shirt. I lost this pink sock (it's mine, did you guess?) while doing my laundry about 10 days ago and I made a thorough search of the floor of the laundry room/garage then. I did the kids' laundry last weekend and there was no pink sock on the floor. I am quite sure that the little elves who steal socks decided today that they were done with this one, so they returned it by sneaking it under the shirt that dropped.

I know what you're thinking -- you're thinking I'm nuts. Obviously the sock was under something else and my movements knocked it into the open. And of course you can believe that all you want. But I know the sock was gone and then it was returned. Christmas magic. I believe.

Monday, December 13, 2021

Reading post: Classics Challenge wrap-up

I've finished all 12 of my chosen books for the 2021 Back to the Classics Challenge! And thus I'm supposed to write one more post explaining what I read and giving links to all the relevant review posts. Although I read them in almost chronological order, I'm listing them here in the original order of the categories, to make things easier for the person who runs the challenge.

My theme this year was Native Americans, fiction by or about, but mostly by AND about. I had some trouble putting together the list, and I changed it a bit as I went along, but what I ended up with was amazing. Some of these books are great -- some are pretty awful -- but they all worked together to give me a new understanding of the Indian experience of the past, as well as the present. Just today, ironically, I heard about a book that might have helped me plan my list: The Cambridge History of Native American Literature, published just last year. But since our library doesn't own it and it is enormous and expensive... well, I think I did pretty well on my own.

Of the books on this list, my favorite was Waterlily by Ella Cara Deloria. But I also read some other books not on the list, to accompany these books, and my favorite of all the Native American books I read this year was actually Sundown by John Joseph Mathews, published in 1934, which I read to accompany Brothers Three by John Milton Oskison (which I didn't like).

Here are the books I read, in the official category order.

1. A 19th century classic. Queen of the Woods by Simon Pokagon, 1899.

2. A 20th century classic. Waterlily by Ella Cara Deloria, written in the 1940s but published posthumously in 1988.

3. A classic by a woman author. Cogewea, the Half-blood by Mourning Dove, 1927.

4. A classic in translation. Winnetou: The Treasure of Nugget Mountain by Karl May, 1878.

5. A classic by a BIPOC author. House Made of Dawn by N. Scott Momaday, 1968. 

6. A classic by a new-to-you author. Brothers Three by John Milton Oskison, 1935.

7. A new-to-you classic by a favorite author. The Last of the Mohicans by James Fenimore Cooper, 1826.

8. A classic about an animal or with an animal in the title. The Man Who Killed the Deer by Frank Waters, 1942.

9. A children's classic. Indian Captive by Lois Lenski, 1941.

10. A humorous or satirical classic. The Illiterate Digest by Will Rogers, 1924.

11. A travel or adventure classic. The Life and Adventures of Joaquin Murieta, the Celebrated California Bandit by John Rollin Ridge, 1854.

12. A classic play. The Cherokee Night by Lynn Riggs, 1932. 

A few more thoughts on what I read: I think my greatest "discovery" this year was Will Rogers. I knew the name but I didn't know why I knew it. Now, having read his biography as well as a collection of his humorous writings, I'm a huge fan! I just wish my mother were still alive, because I could have talked to her about him. She was 13 when he died -- I'm sure she knew about him.

Another thing I got out of reading these books was a much greater sense of the different types of Indian nations and where they are and were. Even though I knew the names of many tribes before I did this project, I didn't have a good geographical sense of them. Now the country, for me, has been redrawn. I have a much clearer sense of which parts of the land belong to which people. When I pick up a new book, I read the name of the tribe and the book's setting and I think, oh yes, that's also where this other book took place, or that's someone from this group that I read about earlier. It's a very interesting effect.

Finally, I want to mention some doubts I had before starting this project. Last year I read Black authors and learned so much about the historical Black experience in America. It was really life-changing. So this year I wanted to do the same thing with Indigenous people. But I felt a little funny about it too. Wasn't I being kind of racist even to think this way? Why don't I do a project where I read only works by German-Americans, for instance? And of course I could do that -- maybe I even will, one of these years. It would be interesting to read about how German immigrants gradually became simply "Americans." But it's also really interesting to read the writing of people who for whatever reason haven't been permitted to enter the mainstream, who are still considered "other" despite their people having been here for hundreds or thousands of years. It's not racist to recognize that something exists, that something has happened. So, I don't know what my next reading project will be, but this year's and last year's have been fascinating.

Reading post: House Made of Dawn

I have finished my 12th and last book for the Classics Challenge: House Made of Dawn by N. Scott Momaday (Kiowa), which was published in 1968, just 53 years ago. I chose it to fulfill category #5, "A classic by a BIPOC author," where BIPOC stands for Black, Indigenous, People of Color. Nine of my 12 authors would fit into this category, so it was just a matter of choosing which book to put here. House Made of Dawn won the Pulitzer Prize in 1969 and is considered to have kicked off the Native American Renaissance in literature.

Momaday (who is still alive, born in 1934) is Kiowa on his father's side, but his mother was part Cherokee and part white. Momaday was born in Oklahoma and lived for a while on the Kiowa reservation there, but when he was young his parents moved to the Southwest to teach at the Navajo, Pueblo, and Apache reservations, and that's where he grew up. Momaday says that his main character Abel's home village in House Made of Dawn is based on Jemez Pueblo in New Mexico -- which reminds me of Frank Waters' book, The Man Who Killed the Deer, which was set at Taos Pueblo in New Mexico. I haven't yet found anything written about the connection between the two novels, but it seems like there might be something -- probably behind an academic journal paywall. Both were based on true stories and describe the spiritual journey of an Indian man whose soul has been disturbed by white culture -- but of course that is the central theme of most Native American literature that I've read. Waters' book is more hopeful, while Momaday's is more realistic.

I was surprised, when I started reading House Made of Dawn, that it is set in the past, i.e., several years prior to 1968, when it was published. The first chapter takes place in 1945, and the rest of the book in 1952. I don't know why Momaday chose to do this, but his character Abel is just back from service in World War II at the start of the book, so that's important. The saddest scene in the book is near the beginning, when Abel's grandfather -- the only member of his family still alive -- drives his old wagon to meet his grandson's bus. Abel is returning from military service and this should be a happy reunion. But Abel is dead drunk and does not even recognize his grandfather. It's symbolic of what's happened to Abel, what a mess he is after his interaction with white society.

The book is beautifully written, but it isn't easy to read. I got lost in the language many times and had very little idea what was happening. Wikipedia told me that the book was originally supposed to be a series of poems, then a collection of stories, and finally became a novel. And that makes a lot of sense. The various sections don't hang together well. When Abel becomes involved with the white woman, Angela, I thought that would lead to something bad, but I don't think it does (see, I'm not even sure). It doesn't really lead anywhere, although she shows up again near the end of the book. There's an albino Indian, and Abel kills him because he thinks he's a snake or a witch (I don't think that had anything to do with Angela, but maybe it did), and then he goes to jail, and after he's released he goes to Los Angeles, where the rest of the book takes place until Abel goes home again. 

This is a little weird to say, but after reading the book I felt sorry for Scott Momaday. The novel is beautiful and shows a lot of promise, but I'm not sure it deserved the Pulitzer Prize (though, looking at a list of books published in 1968, maybe it was the best choice). This is a case where early success probably stifled someone who could have become a great writer, who had the ability. He published only a few things after House Made of Dawn, bits and pieces, poetry and stories and essays and just one other novel. You get the feeling he might have been afraid to publish something that wouldn't live up to his first book. Of course, he was also busy being an English professor and a sort of ambassador for Indigenous writers and writing.

The main achievement of House Made of Dawn, in my opinion, was how it inspired and opened doors for other Native American writers. Without Momaday's work there might have been no Louise Erdrich, who I consider a national treasure, someone who was not stifled by early success and has gone on to write amazing novels. I gather that Momaday has accepted his fate and his role. I might read more by him -- people seem to like his second book, The Way to Rainy Mountain, which "blends folklore with memoir." All in all, this was an interesting way to end the Challenge -- not with a bang, but with a thoughtful, imperfect, but valuable read.

Sunday, December 12, 2021

A slight pause

I thought today's post would be about all the things I got done this week and how very efficient I've been and how everything's just swimming along perfectly.

I didn't really think that -- something always goes wrong at Christmas.

Anyway, nothing's actually gone wrong -- I got 3/4 of the cards done and we had our first measurable snowfall -- but I have needed to take a slight pause in Christmas preparations because of a strong reaction to my third Covid shot! I didn't have much of a reaction to the first two, just some tiredness, but this booster has really done me in. It is quite possibly because I decided to "mix & match," have a Moderna booster when my first two shots were Pfizer. The injector person warned me that this might happen.

I got the shot Friday afternoon and felt mostly OK the rest of the day, maybe just a little out of it, though I did have some gastrointestinal trouble when Teen B and I went to Target that night. Saturday we were scheduled to take a tour of Boulder High School at 9 am, so I gallantly got myself up by 7:30 and all of us out the door by 8:35. The tour lasted about two hours -- first we parents sat in the auditorium and listened to a presentation while the kids took a tour, and then the parents took a tour while the kids listened to a presentation (not the same presentation, from what I could gather from the twins). The tour involved a lot of walking, very fast, and a certain amount of stair-climbing too, because the high school is three stories tall, but I survived it. I only started to feel bad at the very end, waiting for the final Q&A to end. Then we went to Starbucks and then home, and that's when the symptoms really kicked in -- headache, nausea, and fever. I messed around on the computer for a few hours, too out of it to do anything else, finally decided to lie down around 4 or so, and then couldn't really get up again. We were going to eat out, but I couldn't go anywhere or do anything. The kids put themselves to bed, sort of (they lay in bed fighting about who was going to get up and turn out the light), but they didn't feed the cats, so I had to get up and do that (and turn off their stupid light). I managed to load the dishwasher and run it, and then I went back to bed. 

This morning I woke up around 6:30 am, got myself a 7-Up (from the "illness" stash), and went back to bed until around 10:30, when the cats got me up, starving. I've now got two loads of laundry going and I've been wasting time on the computer all afternoon. No energy to do anything more. All my plans for what I was going to accomplish this weekend -- finish the cards, repair the tree, finish decorating the tree, clean the living room, set up some other decorations, etc. -- are postponed. It's OK. Christmas is always such a huge undertaking, a huge rush -- but nobody really cares whether you get it all done. I mean, it's OK to cut corners here, do things at the last minute, etc. Whatever you get done is great, whatever you don't get done is whatever.

I did spend a little time thinking about how unhelpful the twins have been through this. They are so addicted to their devices and games that they spend all their time doing that and never give a thought to anything else. They could have worked on the tree for me. Well, maybe not. They don't know how to repair it using hose clamps (of which I bought 10 more at McGuckin's this week). I should show them, assuming I remember how. The cats have already knocked down four ornament-covered branches -- I'm sure there will be more. They could have fed the gosh-darn cats, that's what they could have done. And turned off their own stupid light, instead of lying in their beds arguing about it so loudly that their voices came through the wall and woke me up.

OK, enough grousing. I keep thinking: what if I really got sick? What if I didn't have the vaccine and instead got Covid? If this is a taste of what the real disease is like, I sure don't want to get it!

It's about 4:45 pm. We're going to Chili's for dinner (I should be able to drive now, my fever's almost gone). Before that, I should put away the first load of laundry and stick the second load in the dryer. And... maybe that's enough. We'll eat, I'll put the rest of the laundry away when we get home, we'll burn three Advent candles for a while, and then I'll go to bed again.

Christmas will be waiting for me tomorrow or the next day, when I feel up to it again.

Sunday, December 5, 2021

December doings

As I write this, Rocket Boy is still in Boulder, even though the plan was for him to leave today. It occurred to him last night that he still had a lot of things that he wanted to get done, so he stayed an extra day. He'll get on the road tomorrow morning after the kids go to school. Today he has...

  • finished assembling our old tree, 
  • removed the lowest level of branches after it became clear that Baby Kitty was going to remove them for us if we didn't do it first, 
  • put the lights on the tree, 
  • and put lights on the outside of our house. 
  • He also signed all the Christmas cards, which I bought at McGuckin's on Friday (RB was supposed to go with me to pick them out, but he needed to take Teen A to the swim store across the parking lot to get new trunks, so he said whatever I picked out was fine). I also finalized our xmas letter, after weeks of agonizing over it, and he approved it. (I might still tinker with it, but it's basically done.) Tomorrow I can make the copies and start mailing out cards. 

Unless I'm busy being depressed because he's gone back to St. Louis. I always seem to need to do that for a while after he goes. I was feeling like that last night, but then we got an extra day with him, so I'm more chipper tonight.

I feel as though this week went really fast and we didn't get enough done. Rocket Boy worked a lot -- something I absolutely cannot complain about, since that's what's keeping us going -- and I did this and that, laundry and dishes and grocery shopping and helping the kids with their homework. I also read a lot, since I couldn't spend much time on the computer. It makes Rocket Boy antsy if I'm in the desk room when he's working, doing stuff on my computer -- especially if I'm playing computer solitaire, but also if I'm writing emails or even reading The New York Times online. He's gotten used to having his quiet apartment to work in. So I spent a lot of time lying on our bed and reading. It's a hard life, I know.

Yesterday (Saturday, that is), we went to the Boulder Parade of Lights. We always go, if they have one (last year they didn't, of course), but this year was special because Teen B was playing his clarinet in his middle school band. We had to get there early to drop him and Rocket Boy off at 15th & Pearl, and then I had to find a place to park, ending up on the other side of downtown, at 10th & Walnut, because so many streets were blocked off. Teen A and I walked back to 15th & Pearl, then he and RB and I went to Broadway & Pearl to watch the parade, then back to 15th & Pearl to pick up Teen B, then back to 10th & Walnut to get the car. I figure I walked about 20 blocks, total. We were all dreadfully tired when it was over. But such a thrill to watch Teen B marching by.

Of course, I kept wondering whether we should even have gone. There were a LOT of people there, and very few of them were wearing masks. Rocket Boy wore his while we stood and watched the parade, because we were up close and personal with a lot of other people for 40 minutes or so. I kept putting mine on and then pulling it down to expose my nose and mouth. Finally it occurred to me that I should stop worrying and enjoy myself because the omicron variant may chase us all away from gatherings soon enough. Boulder County has had its first case, but I don't think it's widespread yet. A week, two weeks from now, maybe we won't be going anywhere.

Tonight was the last night of Hanukkah and the second Sunday in Advent, so we lighted all our candles. Most years, I stress about whether it's appropriate to light Hanukkah candles when we're not Jewish. This year, for whatever reason, it didn't bother me. As I always say, it's not as though we're trying to approximate Yom Kippur. We're celebrating Judaism. And the kids are so used to observing it now that I can't just stop. They fight over who gets to light the candles, they nag me each night if I forget.

It's odd how early Hanukkah is this year. Next year it's going to be all mixed up with Christmas, but this year there's a wide separation. It feels strange to have it over already. But there are two more Sundays of Advent, and almost three weeks until Christmas. Lots of time left -- or is there?

This coming week I've got to get serious about Christmas. I'll try to get the cards sent out this week, decorate the tree, and do any online shopping I want to do, since otherwise it won't have a chance of arriving in time. Then next week I can do in-person shopping and start baking. What am I forgetting? I'll look over old blog posts to figure out what I do at this time of year.

1. Cards. In good shape there. Need to get the letter photocopied tomorrow and then start addressing envelopes and writing notes on the cards. I'm a little short on stamps, could drop by the post office and get some. I'll try to do 10 cards a day and they'll go quickly and pleasantly.

2. Cookies. I'm going to hold off on these. I'll probably start baking around December 15th or so, maybe later. Plenty of time. I'm gradually collecting ingredients; should make a list of what I'm going to bake.

3. Other Food. At some point I'll need to plan Christmas Eve and Christmas Day dinner. But that's a long way off. The most important thing right now is to serve lots of vegetables for dinner over the next few weeks, to balance out all the holiday treats that have already started sneaking in. No more than one Starbucks visit per week, despite how few chances remain to order a caramel brulee latte.

4. Decorating and cleaning. I'm thrilled that the tree is up and we have lights on the house, but there are several more things to do. I have to put the ornaments on the tree -- this week -- and I also need to tidy the living room, move a lot of junk somewhere else. Teen B has agreed to pack up his Legos that have been on top of a cabinet in the living room for several years now. We'll work on all that this week.

5. Gifts. Even though I'm not planning to spend a lot of money, it's nice to have things to unwrap. I thought I should do some serious thinking about what we actually need. I could buy, I don't know, a sack of rice and put it in a gift bag. Or maybe that's too silly. Anyway, I need to start shopping. This week and next and then I should be all done, because the kids will be out of school.

6. Gifts to the Community. Colorado Gives Day is this Tuesday, so I have to decide who I'm giving money to and set up those donations. Usually we give to the Boulder and Longmont Humane Societies and Teen A's old private school. Last year I also gave to the Park County Humane Society (where our cabin is) and I'll probably do that again. And what else? I think I could choose at least one more charity. Must think. I'm also going to donate during Kwanzaa like I did last year, but I can figure that out later.

7. Music & Events. Ah. Normally I go to every free or low-cost concert I can find. But maybe not this year, even if there are some. Until we know more about what omicron's going to do, I'd like to be cautious. So sad. Update: I just checked and the library isn't even having any concerts, just like last year. So another year with no harp concert. I hate this virus. However, there is a play at the kids' school and we'll go to that. I need to sign up for it on HelpatSchool.

8. Travel. Well, we need to figure out when Rocket Boy is coming back and make him a reservation. I think he's going to fly, not drive, since he drove out for Thanksgiving. (Or he could take the train.) Then we need to figure out whether we're doing any traveling after Christmas. We were going to go to Tucson for a few days, but that isn't looking so likely now. I tried to find flights and there was just nothing. So unless a lot of people decide to cancel due to omicron -- and if people are doing that, would we really want to travel? -- we probably aren't going to Tucson. 

9. Staying Healthy. Always important, but especially so during the pandemic. I need to resume my daily walks, which have gotten all mixed up while Rocket Boy's been here. I need to go to bed early and get plenty of rest. I'm getting my booster shot on Friday, but I still haven't gotten a flu shot -- really should figure out how to do that. 

10. Reading. I need to read my last book for the Classics Challenge this week. Then I can read whatever I want to finish out the year. The book group isn't meeting until January, but I should buy the book (The Soul of an Octopus by Sy Montgomery).

It all sounds totally do-able. A week from now, or especially two weeks from now, I may be more stressed. But right now it all sounds fun.

I just wish Rocket Boy didn't have to go back to St. Louis and could stay here until January.

Sunday, November 28, 2021

Thanksgiving week

Well, it's Sunday evening and the kids go back to school tomorrow. Thank goodness! Good riddance to noisy, smelly, messy teenagers! I mean, not permanently, but just for a while. On our way home from a movie and errands today, Rocket Boy whispered to me, "Do they really go away tomorrow?" and I whispered back, "Yes! For several hours!" and he sighed in delight.

It's been a good week, don't get me wrong. It's just that we're old and tired and we need our rest. 

What did we do this week? Several things, falling into various categories:

  1. Saw movies.
  2. Celebrated Thanksgiving.
  3. Took a short trip to Wyoming.
  4. Celebrated the Baby Kitty's 2nd birthday.
  5. Celebrated the 1st Sunday of Advent and the 1st night of Hanukkah.

1. Saw movies

The kids have been asking me for WEEKS if we could go to another movie in a theatre, and I've been putting them off, putting them off. So this week I said we could see a movie. Or movies, as it turned out, because they had a long list of things they wanted to see. We ended up seeing FOUR different movies at the Cinemark Theatres in Boulder, plus one on DVD at home. Considering that I am not that much of a movie fan anymore, it was a lot.

  • On Monday the kids and I saw Clifford the Big Red Dog. They both wanted to see it.
  • On Tuesday, the kids and I saw Ghostbusters: The Afterlife. They both wanted to see it and I was slightly less horrified about having to see it than the other kids' movies.
  • On Wednesday, the kids and I saw Encanto. They both wanted to see it, but especially Teen B.
  • On Thursday night, we all watched the original Ghostbusters on DVD at home.
  • Today, Sunday, we all saw Dune (2021). This was Rocket Boy's choice.

Of these, Dune was definitely my favorite. I was actually interested in the story and I thought the acting was good. I have somehow never read the book (will probably have to do that now), so I didn't know what to expect and sometimes had trouble following the plot. But for the most part my attention was held. 

The other movies -- well, I'm pretty tired of kids' movies and none of these were even great kids' movies. Clifford the Big Red Dog -- why did we even have to go to that? The only other people in the theatre had brought little kids, like three-four-five years old little kids. I have no idea why my 13-year-olds needed to be there. Ghostbusters: The Afterlife was better, but not enough better. It was more of a tribute to the original Ghostbusters (which is why we then had to watch the original, since the twins had no memory of having seen it before, even though I'm sure they had) than a truly original movie. I was also disturbed by a similarity between this and Clifford: both featured a 12-year-old white girl with a small Asian boy as a sidekick. Diversity in movies is always nice -- it's fantastic in Dune -- but when two kids' movies come up with the same idea to make the movie "diverse," it feels weird.

Oh, and Encanto. A lot of fuss about nothing, in my opinion. Beautiful graphics, pleasant (forgettable) songs, and absolutely no plot at all. No villain, no conflict. They were upset about something but I couldn't figure out what. Plus, I often couldn't understand what the characters were singing or saying (so maybe there was a plot, but I missed it). A total waste of my time. I don't know why it's getting such good reviews. Well, maybe it was better than Clifford the Big Red Dog.

Teen B also wanted to see House of Gucci, but we didn't manage that one. Maybe next weekend. And he wants to see Sing 2, but fortunately that won't be out until near Christmas. Oh, God, I'll probably have to see a whole bunch more movies during Christmas vacation. Rocket Boy certainly won't go. He was very upset by the experience of seeing Dune. They wouldn't let him bring his backpack into the theatre, he thought the sound was too loud, and he was horrified by the number of ads we had to watch before the movie started. I was actually pleased that we got to see some new ads -- I saw exactly the same ads for all three kids' movies. But there's a horrible ad with Matt Damon hawking cryptocurrency that I have now seen four times and it was unpleasant the first time. Today when I saw it beginning again I thought I was going to vomit. 

Yeah, it's been a fun week with movies. And I didn't get to see anything I wanted to see (to be honest, there isn't anything in theatres right now that I really want to see).

2. Celebrated Thanksgiving

Rocket Boy wanted us to go on a trip this week, and he thought we should leave on Wednesday, thus skipping Thanksgiving. But I objected. The kids want to do Thanksgiving, I said, and I hate having Thanksgiving in a restaurant. It's always terribly expensive and not very good. So he agreed that we could have a normal Thanksgiving at home and go on a trip the next day.

The menu: cranberry chutney, sweet potato casserole, spicy spinach dish, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, Pillsbury crescent rolls, swordfish with lemon-caper sauce, and pumpkin pie with whipped cream. Oh, and sparkling cider to drink.

I'm perfectly capable of making most of this by myself (Rocket Boy does the mashed potatoes and gravy), but I thought that this year the twins should be more involved. So I read off the list to them and told them to choose two dishes to help with. Teen A chose pumpkin pie and swordfish; Teen B chose stuffing and gravy. And then they actually helped! Teen B was not that interested, but he did cut up the celery for the stuffing, and he did some mixing and stirring. Teen A, on the other hand, was totally into the pie-making. He insisted on doing it all himself (while I read the directions), and then for the rest of the vacation he referred to me as "Bad at pumpkin pie making," since apparently if he is good at it, I must be bad at it. 

I'm OK with that. I was just so pleased he helped.

He didn't do too much with the swordfish (not much to do, plus it involved the scary broiler) and Teen B annoyed Rocket Boy by not wanting to stir the gravy, but it's a start, ya know? I'm very encouraged. We will definitely repeat this next year.

After the delicious dinner we took a walk together, and then we watched the original Ghostbusters as we ate the pumpkin pie. Totally something out of Norman Rockwell. A very nice day.

3. Took a short trip to Wyoming

I really would have preferred to spend Friday reading on my bed, but I had promised Rocket Boy we could take a trip (gotta help reduce inflation), so I pulled myself together and packed a small bag. And off we went to Cheyenne, Wyoming for some R&R. Not most people's idea of a place to rest and relax, but we actually had a very nice time. It's only 100 miles away and you can take I-25 for most of it, so it's fast. We went first to the Air Force base, and Rocket Boy's current job credentials were enough to get us past the guard shack and off to the museum (which is pretty cheesy, but nice). The not very great exhibits were further enhanced by a lot of Santa Claus dolls and other Xmas decor piled all over everything. I bought some souvenirs. On our way out we got lost, but in the process we saw a herd of antelope and some magpies, so it was worth it. Rocket Boy and I did a lot of reminiscing about when we used to drive to Cheyenne to TEACH at the base for 8 hours straight on Saturdays. This trip was more fun, but those trips had their charm too.

Then we went to play mini golf at the Ice & Events Center, getting there just in time, as it was getting late (around 4 pm) and darkish. They supposedly close at dark, but it was fairly dark by the time we left and another family was just getting started. Otherwise we were the only people on the course. 

After mini golf, we checked into our hotel (a Days Inn). I had gotten a large, airy room with two queen beds and a set of bunk beds, which was great (though the beds weren't actually comfortable, unfortunately). Rocket Boy and I shared one queen bed, Teen A took the other, and Teen B took the lower bunk bed. There was a curtain you could pull across the bunk beds, presumably to help put small children to sleep while their parents stay up and watch TV or whatever, but Teen B liked the curtain because it gave him privacy.

We had dinner at Shari's, a chain that we used to eat at in Laramie. Then back to the hotel for swimming: there was a nice pool (though a little chilly) and we spent an hour in it. There was another family with two boys there too, from Idaho. (You meet the most interesting people in Wyoming.) The hot tub, unfortunately but not surprisingly, was broken.

The next morning we had a rather spartan, free breakfast (apparently due to supply chain problems, though it seemed to me they could have gone to the grocery store) and then lay around the room reading (me and Rocket Boy) or playing stupid video games (the twins) until it was time to check out at 11. Then we drove to the Cheyenne Botanic Gardens, which I had not known existed, and had a lovely time touring the indoor conservatory. (The grounds are probably beautiful in June, but not so much in November. Plus it was very windy, as it almost always is in Cheyenne.) I bought some things at the gift shop, as a way of giving back, since the Gardens were free (I also stuck $5 in a donation box and Rocket Boy gave the receptionist $10). 

Then we drove back to Boulder, stopping for lunch at Johnson's Corner truck stop, where we had stopped for lunch on our way up the day before. We had left the cats on their own, with some extra food, so it was important to get home that day. Our Thanksgiving leftovers were all in the fridge, waiting for us, so dinner was no problem at all.

4. Celebrated the Baby Kitty's 2nd Birthday

Mr. Merlino actually turned two on Saturday, but we were too tired to do anything about it yesterday, so today after seeing Dune and buying Teen A some new shoes, we picked up a small cake at King Soopers and took it home for a party.

This is not a good photo, but I chose it because you can just barely sort of vaguely see the Baby Kitty, as he escapes from Teen A's arms. Rocket Boy had just said happy birthday to him, which scared him for some reason. He is still not totally sure about RB.

Merlin did not have any cake, of course (I offered him a forkful of mine but he declined), but we enjoyed it. After the cake, we opened his birthday present, which I bought several weeks ago and saved until now. It's a cat tunnel, a little like one I saw in the "Breaking Cat News" comic strip. 

Baby Kitty obligingly went in it (Sillers bit him on the neck while he was in there), but it wasn't as big a hit as we had hoped. Maybe he and Sillers will play with it more later, after their naps. Or maybe in the middle of the night, that's always a good time. Or tomorrow morning, after the twins go to school. We're all looking forward to that. Have I mentioned that?

5.  Celebrated the 1st Sunday of Advent and the 1st night of Hanukkah

As if this week wasn't busy enough, today is both the first Sunday of Advent and the first night of Hanukkah! So I begged and pleaded with Rocket Boy to find the box with the advent wreath and the hanukkiah in it, and after dinner (more Thanksgiving leftovers) he did so. And we lighted the first candle of Advent and the first candle (plus the shumash) of Hanukkah. And all was right with the world.

The week ahead should be quieter -- the twins go back to school, which will be wonderful. (Maybe I should stop saying that.) Rocket Boy and I have a zoom call tomorrow, and then he has a medical appointment. My book group meets at 5:30. After that, the days will be simpler until next Saturday when Teen B is scheduled to march in the Parade of Lights. Oh, and we also have a tour of one of the high schools on Thursday night. That'll be interesting. But other than that the days should be pretty low-key. Rocket Boy will work. I'll do this and that. We'll put up the tree (I hope). It'll be good. He will probably leave next Sunday, a week from today, and that will be sad. But I think (I hope) he will be back a few weeks later for Christmas.

As the end of the year rushes toward us, I feel the need to revisit my resolutions and see whether there are any undone that I could still do. Colorado Gives Day is coming up, so I'll need to plan for that. And I liked what I did last year, celebrating Kwanzaa by giving money and buying from Black-owned businesses and authors. I have some more reading to do to finish those goals, so there's that too. And of course Christmas stuff -- baking, cards, and a bit of shopping. The kids have three more weeks of school and then two weeks off. We might plan another trip for after Christmas (somewhere farther afield than Cheyenne), though I'm wondering what this new covid variant is going to do to travel. Ah, well, we can still plan and hope, even though it may not work out. Kind of like life in general. Enjoy it while you can.

Sunday, November 21, 2021

Vacation week

Thanksgiving vacation has begun and Rocket Boy has come home, so we are the usual mixture of very happy and somewhat irritated. It's nice to have him home. 

He arrived about 7:30 pm Saturday, after a day in which I vacuumed the whole house AND cleaned the bathroom, plus did a load of laundry and cooked and tidied. (The house looked really nice and RB noticed and commented.) For the last hour or so he had been sending us short texts each time he drove past a town or landmark: Limon, Byers, Sapp bros, Scotts (i.e., the restaurant Great Scott's), and then Home. We all got that "Home" text, looked at each other, and then shouted, "Dad's here!" He was waiting outside for us to notice his message.

I had made dinner -- baked tofu, some leftover rice, broccoli -- and there wasn't really enough. The "boys," all three of them, were fighting over the last of it. I'm used to cooking for three, not four!

Today he kept asking me, "What's the plan?" "What are we doing today?" "What should we do now?" I finally had to explain to him that we usually take it easy on Sunday. I do the kids' laundry, sometimes we go to Starbucks for treats, sometimes I go to the library,  I write a blog post off and on through the afternoon, the kids play computer games. "Oh, OK," he said, and busied himself switching out the screen doors for the storm doors.

But he wanted to do something more ambitious, too, so I jumped online and got us entry tickets for the Denver Museum of Nature and Science at 3 pm. They have an exhibit that wasn't open yet when he was here in October: "Survival of the Slowest." It has live animals! (also some statues) The Zoo must be jealous. 

There was a big open area with five Sulcata tortoises. They weren't super big. There was a sign explaining that people adopt them when they're little and then get overwhelmed when they get big, but I thought the exhibit wasn't very convincing in that way. If people think this is as big as they get, they'll probably say, oh, I could handle that, and then, whoops, what to do when they actually get enormous?

Most of the animals in the exhibit are reptiles, so you figure they're probably OK with the whole thing. Reptiles are pretty easygoing. There were lizards, a chameleon, a skink, a very fat toad, a tarantula.

Oh, but the sloth! There was a beautiful two-toed sloth and it was so adorable. I saw it yawn and scratch its eye. It has such long hard nails, I was sure it was going to rip its own eye out. It didn't, though. It just yawned again and went back to sleep. The volunteer nearby said it likes to find a comfortable place in its enclosure and then just stay there for hours.

We also enjoyed the boa constrictors. The volunteer said there were four of them in the enclosure. We could only see one, a very friendly, interactive one, and then a big heap, which apparently was three others. There was also a tortoise in with them. We thought the tortoise looked worried.

The twins eventually got tired and ran off to the Health Exhibit, but Rocket Boy and I went over to the guitar exhibit. That was OK. It probably would have been very exciting for someone who was really interested in guitars. 

We almost always go to Great Scott's on our way home from the museum, but this time we went to the Chili's in Westminster because it's near the Honeybaked Ham place and we wanted to get a blueberry coffeecake. No ham -- we're planning to have swordfish for Thanksgiving dinner, if there's any in the stores. But we like that coffeecake. It's a special treat. I also got a bag of rolls, though they looked kind of stale. I never make my own rolls.

We still haven't decided how we're going to spend the rest of the week, but we have at least agreed that there will be a Thanksgiving dinner at home. Rocket Boy would have been happy to skip it, but the boys actually want it. They remember all the yummy side dishes that we always have and they're eager to eat them. Today, on my way home from the library (I went before we went to Denver) I stopped at Safeway to buy Rocket Boy some oat milk, and while I was there I picked up a bag of cranberries, and so then I also had to get a jalapeno pepper, and a jar of crystallized ginger. I will have to study my cranberry sauce recipe to see if there are any other odd ingredients I need to buy, but those two always come to mind. Onion, garlic, a lemon, dry mustard, a cinnamon stick? I can't remember if I have those. Well, I need to go to the store anyway.

But I don't know if we're going to go on a little trip after Thanksgiving or not. Rocket Boy suggested we go to Glenwood Springs, but that would mean driving I-70 over Vail Pass on Sunday afternoon when everyone who's gone to the mountains would be driving home, and I'm just not willing to do that. Maybe we will end up going to Wyoming instead. It will probably be uncrowded.

I was a little freaked out by the dearth of masks at the Denver Museum. Denver hasn't reinstated its mask mandate, so masks are "recommended," but not required. I'd say maybe half the people at the museum were wearing them. At first I thought all the maskless people were rule-flouting anti-vaxxers, but eventually I realized that they weren't breaking rules, they were ignoring recommendations. It's not really the same thing. It's quite possible many of them were vaxxed.

I think the last time we all went to the museum together may have been last March, the day of the King Soopers shooting in Boulder. Nothing like that today, but I was just reading about the SUV that mowed down a lot of people at a Christmas parade in Wisconsin. Our holiday parade is on December 4th and Teen B will be marching in it. Sigh. I don't want to worry about something like that happening. Why do people do this?

Tomorrow I'm supposed to take the kids to a movie. I think we're going to see "Clifford the Big Red Dog." I'm not excited about it -- haven't we gotten beyond these sorts of movies yet? -- but it's OK. Rocket Boy has a dentist appointment to get his new crown. I'd rather see a movie than do that. 

I don't have to worry about cleaning this week because the house is freshly clean, just keep up with the kitchen, do laundry, scoop the litter boxes, and all that. Rocket Boy will work, the twins will goof off, he'll get mad because they're on their devices all the time, and I'll try not to get in the middle of that argument. We'll make a puzzle, play some games (I hope). I need to figure out what else I need from the store. I should probably make the cranberry sauce on Tuesday or Wednesday. The rest can be made on Thursday -- it's not that hard. Sweet potatoes, regular potatoes, stuffing, spinach dish, pumpkin pie. Some kind of sauce for the swordfish, gravy, whipped cream. Several bottles of sparkling cider. Am I forgetting anything?

Friday, November 19, 2021

Reading post: Indian Captive and other children's books

I have finished my eleventh book for the Classics Challenge, so I'm almost done. I think I will save the 12th book for December. Today I am writing about what I read for category #9, "A children's classic." I actually read four books for this category, all written by white authors, because I was trying to get a sense of how Native Americans have been presented to American children through fiction. The books I read were published between 1941 and 1970. The protagonists of the first two are white and those of the later two are Indian. It is worth noting that all four books are historical fiction -- they all subtly perpetuate the idea that Indians are a part of the past, not the present.

As I read, I started wondering about what a children's book really is. I should know -- I've been reading them all my life. But none of the four books I read seem like typical children's books. I am not sure any of them would be published today without some revision.

The book that I decided to count for the Challenge is Indian Captive: The Story of Mary Jemison by Lois Lenski, published in 1941, about a white girl who was captured by the Seneca in the 1700s. This was not my original choice for this category, and I probably would not have read it if my cousin Marina hadn't recommended it. I hated Lois Lenski when I was a kid. Her books always seemed so depressing. It never would have occurred to me that she would have written a worthwhile book about Indians. But she did. It was part of a series of historical children's books she wrote, before she wrote the "regional" books that I hated so desperately. Indian Captive was a Newbery honor book in 1942.

Mary Jemison was a real person, born in 1743 on board the ship her parents took from Ireland to North America. Her family's home in Pennsylvania was attacked by a group of Seneca Indians and Frenchmen when she was a young girl, and all within were captured except her two older brothers who escaped. Her parents and three other siblings were murdered soon after, but Mary was brought to Fort Duquesne (controlled by the French), where she was given to two Seneca women whose brother had been killed in the French & Indian War the year before. They adopted Mary as his replacement. She ended up living with the Seneca the rest of her life. She had the chance to go back to white society a few different times, but by then she was married and a mother. So she chose to stay with the Seneca. She lived to be 91.

Her story was first published in 1824, when a minister named James E. Seaver wrote it up as the Narrative of the Life of Mrs. Mary Jemison. It is a "captivity narrative," a genre that was especially popular in the 1600s and 1700s because so many white settlers were captured by Indians (sometimes aided by the French) and later escaped or were released. When I was first planning my reading list for the Challenge, I considered including a captivity narrative as one of my books. Mary Jemison's story was especially interesting because she chose to stay with the Seneca. Lenski's book is not the only retelling; there are many versions of the story, some for adults and some for children. 

Lenski's novel, Indian Captive, begins with a fairly accurate description of what happened to Mary (or Molly, as Lenski usually calls her), but gradually deviates from the true story. It's quite interesting to compare her book with the real Narrative. There is some question about how old Mary was when she was captured: she says it happened in 1755, when she would have been 12, but there are indications that it may actually have been 1758, when she would have been 15. Lenski says, in her interesting Foreword to the book, "I have chosen to keep her twelve," presumably because that makes her more of a child, and thus easier for Lenski's readers to identify with her. Of the four "children's" books I read, this one is the most clearly intended for children (Amazon rates it as being for Grades 5-6). But in order to make that true, Lenski had to bury key parts of the real story.

Lenski's book covers about two years of Molly's life, but it includes experiences that the real Mary had over a longer period of time -- and leaves out others. For instance, by the time the real Mary traveled to Genishau with the Seneca, which happens after about a year in Indian Captive, she was married and had a baby. But Lenski omits any suggestion that Mary/Molly will soon be married, probably because she is trying to "keep her" a child. (Perhaps also the idea of her marrying an Indian would have been challenging to a 1941 white audience?) She also makes changes that seem to be attempts to improve the story. In Indian Captive, Molly is first called "Corn Tassel" because of her blond hair, and later earns the name "Little Woman of Great Courage" because she decides to stay with the Seneca. But Mary Jemison's real Seneca name was neither of these. Lenski also chooses to make one of Molly's new sisters mean and the other kind. In Mary Jemison's narrative she refers to both sisters very positively.

The real triumph of Indian Captive is its positive portrayal of the Seneca. Although Molly starts out hating and fearing them, she gradually comes to like and admire them. While the real Mary stayed with the Seneca because her Indian children would have no place in white society, Molly in the book stays because the Seneca are her family now. At the end, she acknowledges that she was never very good at sitting still and doing needlework. The Seneca have taught her to be more patient, but she also just feels more comfortable with them and their world. She feels that her life is more pleasant than it would have been as a white lady. That seems like a radical concept for 1941, and I admire Lois Lenski for putting it in her book.

***

The second children's book I read was Rifles for Watie by Harold Keith, published in 1957. I originally picked this up last year when I was looking for books to read about the Civil War. But when that challenge morphed into books about the Black experience, I set this aside. This year, when I decided to read books about Native Americans, I remembered Rifles and decided it was time to read it. It was my first choice for the children's category until I found Indian Captive.

Rifles for Watie is the story of Jefferson Davis (Jeff) Bussey, a Kansas farm boy who enlists in the Union Army in 1861 when he is 16 years old. He falls in love with a part-Cherokee girl he meets when his unit is stationed in Tahlequah, the capital city of Cherokee Nation in what later became Oklahoma. But she is a rebel, like most Cherokees, and her brother and father are fighting with Stand Watie, a Cherokee general in the Confederate Army. While on scout duty one night, Jeff finds himself surrounded by Watie's men and, to save his own life, pretends to want to join them. He then spends 14 months with the rebels, much of that time laid low with malaria but also fighting with them against the Union occasionally. Finally he learns who on the Union side is illegally selling "repeating rifles" to Watie (hence the novel's title). He runs away from the rebels to deliver that information to the Union Army, with whom he finishes out the war.

So it's an unusual Civil War book, with great sympathy for both sides, although Jeff never truly becomes a rebel. Trying to read between the lines, I wonder whether Oklahoma native Harold Keith wanted to write a pro-Confederacy book and this was the closest he could come. There are very few Black characters in the novel and they are either "happy slaves" (or former slaves, I guess, but still slaving away for their former owners) or portrayed as kind of stupid, speaking terrible broken English. But the Cherokee characters are much more nuanced -- Keith obviously thought highly of them. Maybe his real goal was to write about the Cherokee; maybe making his protagonist a Kansas white boy was just a way to attract more kids to read the book. When Jeff first meets Lucy, the Cherokee girl he falls in love with, he registers her Indian looks but is not put off by them:

...Although the girl's skin had a brownish cast, her complexion was lovelier than wild strawberries. Breathless, he wondered what any girl that pretty was doing in this far-off Indian town.

So there is that implication that being "brownish" is not attractive, and that great beauty was not to be expected in a "far-off Indian town," but otherwise, and ever after this, Jeff finds Lucy stunning. Also, I noticed that she is usually referred to (in Jeff's thinking) as "that rebel girl," not "that Indian girl," which also seems significant -- she's allowed to be defined by her opinions, not her ancestry. Many other Cherokee characters are also portrayed positively. Jeff learns to admire Stand Watie's troops, and Lucy convinces him (in a long, completely unrealistic discussion where the two of them sound like a couple of college professors) that the Cherokees' support for the Confederacy is justified. Sometimes it seems as though it is only the thought of his own family being overrun by Confederate troops that keeps Jeff on the Union side.

The book was fun for me because it hearkened back to some of the books I read earlier in the Challenge, especially The Life and Adventures of Joaquin Murieta, the Celebrated California Bandit by John Rollin Ridge, published in 1854. Ridge was a cousin of Stand Watie and much of what we know about him comes from letters he wrote to Watie. Also, Lucy's explanation for why the Cherokee don't like the U.S. Government involves the story of the fights among the Cherokee over whether to agree to move from Georgia to Oklahoma. Harold Keith manages to include a lot of interesting Cherokee history in the novel.

I enjoyed Rifles for Watie, although I think it's just as well I didn't read it to my boys. It's a bit long (332 pages) and dry for them, there's a lot of tobacco use, the n-word comes up now and then, there are those apologies for the Confederacy -- I don't want to say it's outdated, because it's still a very good book, but maybe better for older kids or even adults, who have a better chance of parsing its mixed messages. Amazon rates it as being for Grades 8-12, and it is apparently now considered a "Teen" book rather than a children's book, even though it won the Newbery Medal (for "distinguished contributions to American literature for children") in 1958.

***

The third book I read was The Story Catcher by Mari Sandoz, published in 1963. When I was trying to choose my book for this category, I came across a couple of children's books about the Sioux by Sandoz, The Horsecatcher and The Story Catcher. The Bookworm had copies of both and I looked at them, but didn't choose them because they seemed dry, plain, uninteresting. It's that university press problem again -- they don't know how to design their books to appeal to a non-scholarly audience (or maybe they don't care to). 

But when I went back to the Bookworm to look for (and find) Indian Captive, I looked at these books again and decided I could read one, for comparison purposes. I chose The Story Catcher because it was Sandoz's last book and it won a couple of awards.

Sandoz was a Nebraska writer, born in 1896, and my mother was a big fan of her work. I've read Old Jules, her biography/memoir of her Swiss immigrant father, which blew me away, but I hadn't read any of her many books about Indians, both fiction and nonfiction. I don't have a good sense of how her work is currently rated, in particular whether her portrayal of Indians is still considered accurate, fair, etc. There is a biography of her, from 1982 -- of course our library doesn't have it, but I decided I'd like to read it, so I just now ordered a used copy (from someone in Lincoln, Nebraska, which seemed appropriate -- I looked him up and he's a music professor who I guess sells books in his spare time). 

One thing I've read about Sandoz is that she researched her Indian books heavily, conducted interviews with elders, read through crumbling manuscripts. Having recently read the almost-ethnography Waterlily by Ella Cara Deloria, I was struck by how similar the world portrayed in The Story Catcher is. And of course, they are supposed to be the same, more or less. They are both about the Lakota, though different branches of the tribe.

The Story Catcher is the coming of age story of Lance, a Sioux teenager (we don't know his exact age, but I'm guessing he might be 15 or 16 or 17 at the start of the book, roughly similar to Jeff Bussey in Rifles for Watie). It's clearly the 1800s, because whites are starting to encroach, but I didn't see anything in the book that explained when in the 1800s. The blurb on the back of the paperback says it's the 1840s, but I don't know how the blurb knows that. I really would have appreciated some explanatory material: a Foreword, an Afterword, something. The only clue we get is the dedication:

Dedicated to the Bad Heart Bull Family,
a long line of story catchers,
and particularly to Amos Bad Heart Bull,
artist and great historian of the Oglala Sioux

Wikipedia tells me that Amos Bad Heart Bull lived from 1868 to 1913, so Sandoz could have known him when she was a teenager (she would have been 16 or 17 when he died), but perhaps she only knew him by reputation. According to Wikipedia, his drawings influenced the design of the interior of the Nebraska state capitol building.

Anyway, back to Lance and The Story Catcher. Like Waterlily, The Story Catcher is mostly just incidents in the life of the tribe, but with a close focus on Lance. Like any teenager, Lance takes a lot of risks: some get him in a lot of trouble, while others end in triumph. He comes close to dying several times, but always manages to save himself. By the end of the book he has proved himself to be not only brave, honorable, and worthy of the girl he loves, but also the tribe's new artist and historian (like Amos Bad Heart Bull and his father).

I probably would not read this to my kids -- it's slow-moving and sometimes a little hard to follow, very different from a modern children's book. I think they would get bored. The writing is lovely, though, and the story of Lance is moving. Sandoz would have been about 67 when the book was published; for an old white woman, she did an amazing job of portraying the mind of a young Sioux warrior. Still, I wonder what makes this a children's book. Is it the focus on a young person? The lack of sex? There is one scene where I think Lance possibly comes close to having sex with the girl he loves, but it's so wildly understated that I wasn't sure. The thing is, there was no sex in Waterlily either, and yet I never thought that seemed like a children's book. There is no shortage of violence in this book -- true of all four books I read, incidentally. Amazon claims it is for Grades 7-9. Hmm.

***

Finally, I read Sing Down the Moon by Scott O'Dell, published in 1970. O'Dell also wrote Island of the Blue Dolphins, another important children's book about Indians of the past written by a white person, but of course I'd already read it (in elementary school, and also more recently, to my kids). I had never read any of O'Dell's other books, and only came upon this one because it was in a Little Free Library in our neighborhood. I wasn't even going to take it, but Teen B told me I should. I put it in our "to be read" pile, but then pulled it out to read to myself for this challenge. It's another Newbery honor book.

I was surprised to discover that O'Dell was only two years younger than Mari Sandoz, though he went on publishing until his death at age 91 in 1989, with two books published posthumously. Sandoz's last book was The Story Catcher, published in 1963, and she died in 1966, which is probably why I thought she was much older. Like Sandoz, O'Dell wrote historical novels about the area where he grew up, in his case California.

This is the first book I've read for the Challenge about the Navajo, but it felt familiar because of all the Tony Hillerman (and now Anne Hillerman) Navajo mysteries I've read! Those books often mention the Long Walk of 1864-65, when the U.S. Government forced the Navajo to leave their land in Arizona and walk to eastern New Mexico, a journey of 300 miles or more. Many of the Navajo died along the way. They were forcibly detained in New Mexico for a few years, and many more of them died during this time. In 1868 the Navajo were allowed to return to their land, which they hold still. But it was a terrible, defining episode in their nation's history.

Sing Down the Moon tells the story of Bright Morning, who is 15 years old when the book begins (not 14, as it says on the back of the book). She lives a rather idyllic life, driving her mother's sheep up into the hills to eat grass every day, though the Long Knives (white Government people) threaten to burn the village down if its warriors go on a raid. One day while she is out with the sheep, she and a friend are captured by Spanish slavers. But after a few months they manage to escape and return to their village, resuming their pleasant life. Bright Morning has her Womanhood Ceremony and is interested in a young man called Tall Boy, who was injured while helping her return from slavery.

Then, just past the halfway point in this rather short book, the Long Knives come back, and this time it's serious. They post a notice saying that the community must leave their home. The people try fleeing to a nearby mesa, but the Long Knives wait them out, and when they are starving, they come down from the mesa and begin the Long Walk to New Mexico. While the book ends happily, we first hear many sad and terrible stories about this experience.

I was puzzled by this book. Who is it for? It is written in simple language, with short sentences and short chapters, so kids certainly can read it. But would they want to? Bright Morning is 15 at the start of the book, and maybe 17-18 at the end, married and with a baby. Much of the subject matter is deadly serious and depressing. But Amazon claims it is for Grades 3-7, and some of the reviewers talk about it being appropriate for elementary school children: "My ten year old enjoyed reading this." I will say one thing: there is no sex. When Bright Morning and Tall Boy marry, he moves into her family's hut, which is already overcrowded.

...Now there was no room, so we made a lean-to of willow poles and earth nearby. It was really more of a cave and in it we stored the things we did not use every day and food if we had more than we needed, which was not often.

That's all we get: no information about where anybody sleeps, just that they built a "lean-to" to store the stuff that now wouldn't fit in the hut because a large young husband has been added to it. A few months later we hear that Bright Morning is going to have a baby, so sex must have occurred, but you sure wouldn't know it. Did someone writing a "children's book" in 1970 really have to be this discrete? Or maybe Scott O'Dell, in his 70s, felt uncomfortable saying anything more.

I read one review from an adult learning English who said they used Sing Down the Moon in her English class and everyone enjoyed reading it. That makes sense to me, because the book presents adult content in very easy to read language. But is it a children's book? I thought about O'Dell's Island of the Blue Dolphins, which is about a young woman left behind on an island when the rest of her tribe is taken to the California mainland. She lives alone on the island for many years before she is finally discovered. It was required reading when I was in elementary school in California. Is that a children's book? I think because Karana, the girl, lives alone, she always seems young. And I admit that Bright Morning always seems young too, despite her husband and child. Sing Down the Moon is in some ways like a preteen's fantasy of adult life.

I'm not sure whether I will read this to my kids or not. I think I will put it back in the "to be read" pile and see if anyone chooses it (we alternate who gets to pick the next book). I may not choose it, but I'll see if one of them does. 

***

And to sum up, what did I learn from reading these four books? Well, as I noted at the beginning of this post, they are all historical. Nothing about Indians today; these are all stories of the past. Scott O'Dell does note, in his Postscript, that the Navajo still exist:

Some 1500 Navahos died at Fort Sumner from smallpox and other diseases. But the group who survived has grown to more than 100,000. The Navahos wanted to live. Like Bright Morning, they thirsted for life. They still do.

So that's kind of a nice thing to say, although why wouldn't the Navajo "thirst for life"? Don't all human beings? And then he goes on to add -- his last comment -- 

You will see girls who look much like her, tending their sheep now in Canyon de Chelly. They are dressed in velveteen blouses, a half-dozen ruffled and flounced petticoats, their hair tied in chignons -- a style copied from the officers' wives at Fort Sumner long ago.

I mean, it's interesting that the Navajo costume is based on what the officers' wives at Fort Sumner wore (this is not mentioned in the novel), but it seems like a weird way to end. It makes the Navajo seem almost stupid, out of date, unaware that the times and the fashions have moved on. 

I'm probably being too critical. Just having a little trouble making sense of everything. All the books I read portrayed Indians in a positive light. Maybe just a little bit too "other"? Maybe in their valiant attempts to portray them as good people, these white authors occasionally forgot that Native Americans are also human beings.