Reading post: Books from the teak bookcase in my room

June will be ending in a couple of hours, we are back from vacation, and it is time for another reading update (I'm taking a break from unpacking to finish writing this). On June 1st I pulled seven unread books (see photo) out of the teak bookcase in my bedroom and started reading the oldest of them. In general, this month's books were very good (I'm keeping them all), and I finished six of the seven.

1. Frankenstein by Mary Shelley (1818). In 2018, Jill Lepore wrote an essay about Mary Shelley and her masterpiece in The New Yorker, and ever since then I've thought about reading it. I wish I'd reread the article before I did, but rereading it afterwards was worthwhile too. Lepore's analysis is excellent, and I'd forgotten her comparison of the monster's story with a slave narrative. I don't want to read this book again (it's very depressing), but I'm glad I finally read it and I'm definitely keeping it.
   
   
2. Burmese Days by George Orwell (1934). I think this book has survived various bookshelf purges because I thought I might like to read about Burma in the 1920s. But when I actually sat down with it, I felt queasy. A review on Amazon claimed there were "no likable characters" in it. I hate books like that. I decided to read 50 of the 287 pages and then decide. Well, surprisingly, I liked it (and several characters were at least somewhat likable). I'm not sure I'd actually recommend it to anyone, but I liked it enough that I'm going to keep it (in case I want to refresh my memory of Orwell's take on Burma/Myanmar in the 1920s).
   
   
3. Memoirs of Hadrian by Marguerite Yourcenar (1951). This is a curious one. I took Latin in junior high/high school and Greek in college, and I still have a shelf of Greek and Latin books in the bookcase in the dining room (see below). So you'd think a novel based on the life of the late Roman emperor Hadrian would appeal to me. And it did, which is why I own it, but I'd never managed to read it before. This month I forced myself to, but I don't know. I read Joan Acocella's essay on the book in The New Yorker (February 2005) and found it much more interesting than the book itself. Yourcenar is a beautiful writer, and in Hadrian she had a fascinating subject, but I didn't find the book fascinating. I kept thinking, this would be better as nonfiction. Oh well, I'll probably keep this. It's the kind of book that is useful to have read, and I might want to refer to parts of it again.
   
   
4. Pnin by Vladimir Nabokov (1957). One of my many failures as a reader is that I have never read Nabokov. As a teenager, I skimmed my parents' copy of Lolita, but that's about it. My parents owned Pnin too (I have their copy), and I've read Chapter One several times, but could never seem to get any further. This time, I read the whole book in one day, and I've been puzzling over why it took me so many years! Pnin is the story of a Russian immigrant, partly based on Nabokov himself. Nabokov makes fun of Pnin the character, and that may have been what stopped me from going further than Chapter One -- I don't like reading about pathetic people. But later in the book Pnin has a few successes, for instance, he's very good at croquet. More importantly, the book as a whole humanizes Pnin. I'm glad I finally read this, and yes, I'll try to read more Nabokov in the future.
   
   A side note: in one chapter, Nabokov says something about how among people, there are solids and there are surds (Pnin is a surd). What on earth is a surd, I wondered. So I googled it and discovered that it can mean someone who is irrational or lacking in sense, a creative intellectual, something like that. While googling, I also discovered a book by the science fiction writer Samuel R. Delany called Of Solids and Surds, so I requested it from the library. It's part of the Yale University Press series called Why I Write. I read it, expecting it to refer to Pnin, but it did not -- he does briefly mention Nabokov's Lolita and Pale Fire, and apparently the word "surd" appears in Pale Fire too. However, partway through, Delany talks about a novel he wrote called Phallos, in response to -- wait for it -- Marguerite Yourcenar's Memoirs of Hadrian. So I requested Phallos from the library too. It's supposed to be quite pornographic (the title is a clue). I can hardly wait...
   
   
5. The Emperor of Ice Cream by Brian Moore (1965). An old friend gave me this book, eons ago (40 years?) and said it was good. I've never had any interest in reading it, but it's moved around with me through the years. I read the first page once or twice and set the book down again. This time, I persevered, and what do you know? It is a good book, well written, about a young man named Gavin (he ages from 17 to 19 over the course of the novel) in WWII-era Belfast who joins the ARP (Air Raid Precautions) because he's failed his school leaving exams and doesn't know what else to do. Not much happens: we meet his fellow ARP members, he has a difficult relationship with a girlfriend and with his father, and he struggles with his conscience. In the end, Belfast is bombed and Gavin, finally doing the job he's been trained for, realizes that he's become an adult. I'm going to keep this for now, and I also might try to read some of Moore's other novels.
   
   
6. Black Rain by Masuji Ibuse (1965). I acquired this paperback after my trip to Japan in 1986 and then never read it. I suppose I thought it would be depressing. It is of course a terrible, horrifying story, but I didn't find it depressing. It's actually a really good book -- yet another that I put off reading for whatever reason and then ended up liking a lot. It's about a man, Shigematsu Shizuma, who was on the outskirts of Hiroshima when the bomb went off, so he was injured, but didn't die. It's told as a story within a story: the outer story takes place a few years later, when Shigematsu and his wife are trying to get their niece Yasuko married, but there is some question as to whether Yasuko suffered radiation sickness from the bomb. To prove that she didn't, Shigematsu digs out his old diaries of what happened right after the bomb, to him and his wife and Yasuko. These diaries, as well as a few others from other people, form the inner, primary story of the book. They are based on the real diaries of the real Shigematsu Shizuma, so although this is a novel, it hews closely to the truth. I definitely recommend it. It's like a real-life dystopian novel, very interesting.
   
   
7. Cheyenne Autumn by Mari Sandoz (1953). I left this for last because I thought it would be a good thing to read when we visited Yellowstone. It probably would have been, too, but I couldn't read it. It's just too horribly, impossibly sad. I thought I could handle it, after my year of reading books by/about American Indians. Nope. I decided to keep it, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to read it. I read the first few pages and then skimmed through some other parts -- and then all through the trip I kept thinking about the few lines I'd read and how sad they were. I kept looking at all the open country and thinking, why couldn't the Indians have stayed here? There are hardly any people, period, in Wyoming and Montana -- why did white people have to kill all the buffalo and most of the Indians and make the rest of them live on crummy reservations and then not give them enough food to survive? I take some responsibility for this because, since my people have been here for so long, undoubtedly I'm distantly related to some of the people who did the deeds (not to mention how I've indirectly benefited from what they did). But I don't know what to do with that responsibility.
   

OK. In July it will finally be time to move out of my bedroom and on to the rest of the house. I will begin with the teak bookcase in the dining room -- yes, we have a bookcase in our dining room. It is a twin to the one in my bedroom. As I recall, we put this here because it goes with the little corner bookcase next to it and there just wasn't anywhere else to put that.

We have a very small, crowded house, and a LOT of books, even though I keep sorting through them and giving them away.

This bookcase is full of things I've never read. Some of them are reference books, and thus not meant to be read cover to cover. Some are grammars of exotic languages, the remnants of my PhD in linguistics. The top shelf has Latin and Greek textbooks, somewhere in the middle are half a dozen baby name books, and on the bottom shelf there are yearbooks, some boxed record albums -- operas, mostly -- and the compact Oxford English Dictionary, complete with microscope. I remember the day my father brought that home from the office. We happily looked up all the dirty words we could think of.

However, there are some books in here that are meant to be read, many of which I've never had the pleasure. So I pulled out ten of them to entertain me this month. I'm not going to try to read all ten. I'll be lucky if I get through four or five. I think some of them are probably really out of date, and so I may find that they're not worth keeping (or reading). 

But we'll see. Should be another interesting month.

Another lovely week

In fact, there were aspects of this week that were not lovely, mainly a lot of fighting on the part of two 15-year-old boys who live with me. But the weather's been great, a mixture of rain and sun, and everything's so green, and my flowers are blooming... Somehow it's easy to let go of the fights and focus on the beauty.

Fights are so boring, anyway. So pointless. I understand that the kids are working things out, that it's part of being a teenager and a brother. It's hard on me, but it's harder on them (words of wisdom from the family counselor we saw for a while). It will be interesting to see what happens (with the fighting) when Rocket Boy is here. 

Because yes, he is on his way! Stayed in Junction City, Kansas last night -- we stayed there when we drove back from St. Louis last summer. That means he has 493 miles to drive today. And on Tuesday, we are going to drive 492 miles to get to Cody, Wyoming. Ha!

In a few minutes I'm going to stop writing and go do 15 minutes of weeding, in preparation for Rocket Boy's arrival. Teen A and I have been so focused on pruning junipers that we've kind of skipped weeding. Thus, our side yard looks like this, and RB will notice. He'll see it when he drives up and parks in the driveway. So I thought I'd spend some time on the weeds today. Teen A and I don't prune on the weekend, but I think a little weeding is OK.

OK, I'm back. I didn't take an after picture (yet), but it already looks a lot better. You can pull a lot of weeds in 15 minutes. You can also get very tired, when it's hot. It's only about 75 degrees right now, but the sun is fierce. The humidity is also higher than normal, about 39% according to weather.gov. And supposedly it's an Ozone Action Day, but I just checked AirNow.gov and our air quality is 48, which is in the "Good" range, so I don't know what they're talking about. 

I'd drive with the kids today (despite the air quality alert, since it seems to be wrong), but it's Teen A's turn and he's gone off somewhere, possibly with friends. He didn't tell me that, just grabbed his bus pass and said he was "going to Safeway," but that probably means friends. If so, that'll be the first time he's seen any friends since school got out a month ago. I'm glad he's seeing friends, but I will never understand why he feels the need to be so mysterious about it.

Driving is going pretty well, if slowly (too many Ozone Action Days). I've now driven twice with each boy, and it's amazing how much better they already are. However, we haven't gone on an actual street yet, just around parking lots. Friday evening I took Teen B to the NCAR parking lot, but there were a lot of people there -- hikers, I think, who were leaving their cars and setting off on the various trails. Still, we drove around a little, and he did OK. Then we went back to their elementary school parking lot and he drove a lot more, clearly getting more and more confident as he went. So I think the next step is to venture out on some quiet streets -- probably OUR street, actually. Hmm.

They are going to go out with an actual driving instructor in July (the 11th for Teen A and the 12th for Teen B), so I don't have to do a LOT with them before then. But we should go on some streets. I'll try to get them both out at least two more times before they go out with the instructor. (Or Rocket Boy can take them. Now there's a good idea.)

But first we're going to go on our trip to Yellowstone. I'm not terribly excited about it, but I think it'll be fun. We'll drive to Cody on Tuesday and stay overnight in a hotel. Then we'll spend Wednesday in the park, exiting at the north entrance where we'll spend the night in a hotel in Gardiner, Montana. Then back into the park for the day on Thursday, exiting at the south entrance where we'll stay at a hotel in Dubois, Wyoming. Friday is up in the air -- I'd like to stay one more day, so that we can go to Grand Teton National Park. But I suspect the twins will want to come home. I didn't make a reservation for Friday night, but I'm sure we could find a room in Rawlins, for example, since it's right on I-80, or even Lander, not drive that far. Well, we'll see.

The kitties have no idea that this is happening, yet, but I'm sure once Rocket Boy arrives and the suitcases start appearing, they'll get worried. The cat-sitters are stopping by this evening, so that'll be the main signal. Poor kitties, all alone for four or five days, except for twice daily visits. What on earth will they do with themselves? (Sleep, wash, run up and down the hallway, wash, sleep.)

I think they look very pretty against the A's blanket that I currently use as a cat protector (protector from cats, that is).

OK, I'm trying to gear myself up to go out and do some more weeding. It's only gone up to 77 degrees, air quality is 50, and they've cancelled the air quality alert. The perfect time to weed. OK, let's do this.

And we're back. I swear, weeding is really hard work. I feel as though I'm going to vomit. Maybe should have waited longer after eating lunch, huh? (Note: after writing this, I lay down and took a short nap. Now I feel better.)

But anyway, if you compare this to the photo above, I think you can see a lot of progress. I got the majority of tall, prickly things pulled up or cut down, although there are still low-to-the-ground things, and of course the mint in the back. 

And now it's later still and Teen A has come home and mowed the lawn and I pulled a bunch MORE weeds, and the compost bin is about 3/4 full, just of weeds and lawn clippings. Also, the cat sitters have come and gone (and gotten the key), exciting Baby Kitty and scaring Sillers. So the cats now know something's up.

We're still waiting for Rocket Boy. It's 8 pm and I think he should be here by 8:30, but it depends on how many times he has to stop, what traffic is like, etc. He texted us from the border -- that was at 5:45 and he was at a rest area that had an exhibit about rattlesnakes. Since then, nothing. He's going to be so tired when he gets here, and I haven't even made any dinner. I feel like I need to lie down again. My tummy objects to all the bending over I do when I pull weeds.

I'll leave you with the photo of this week's compost pick-up. Fourteen bags! plus the compost bin and three bundles of long branches. I watched as the garbageman got out of his truck, put on his gloves and then one by one, hoisted the bags and the branches into the carrier thing in front of his truck. They just barely fit! Then he got back in the truck and pushed buttons to make the carrier thing lift up and dump everything into the main compartment of the truck. Then he gave me a thumbs-up and drove on. So now I know, 14 bags is about the maximum that I should put out. Teen A will be glad we don't have to do any more than that.

Driving through life

Well, another beautiful week in June has passed. The lilac's flowers are almost gone. I make the twins keep the curtain in the desk room open so that I can see what's left of them while I'm on my computer. (We don't keep the window open, because Teen A is allergic to them, poor boy.) I'm always so sorry to see them go, but grateful that they were here.

We had some truly torrential rain this week, and that probably washed away some of the blossoms. I can't tell how much we got, because the rain sensor at NCAR is broken. We got over 2 inches in an hour or so on Tuesday, I think it was, but Friday was also a seriously crazy rain day. It was starting to rain when Teen A and I were doing our morning pruning, and we gave up before the timer rang, it was so miserable.

This coming week looks quite different, with only a chance of rain on Wednesday and Thursday. We'll probably be wanting to end the work early because we're too hot!

I keep wandering around the yard, trying to look at it through Rocket Boy's eyes. What should we try to get done before he gets here (in about a week)? We mowed both the front and back lawns this morning, even though the backyard is mostly just weeds. Just trying to get a sense of things. We took down some little trees this week, including one that was almost totally blocking the little shed thing that you can see in the back of this photo. Now you can see the little shed thing, but of course it makes it easier for someone to enter our yard through the back gate there.

Silly to worry about. None of our gates lock. Anyone could enter our yard at any time, if they were so inclined.

Dancing through life, skimming the surface
Gliding where turf is smooth
Life's more painless for the brainless
Why think too hard when it's so soothing?

I don't know why this song (from the musical Wicked) is stuck in my head, but whenever I think about the twins driving, this song pops into my mind. Yes, it's true. We are driving. Or, I should say, Teen A is driving. Or has driven. Once. When we went to the elementary school parking lot to practice last night, Teen B realized that he'd forgotten his glasses. He needs to wear glasses -- can't see the board in class without them -- but hasn't truly faced up to the fact. So he usually doesn't wear them when he goes out and about, and thus last night he forgot to bring them with him -- and thus he didn't get a turn.

But we'll go out later and try again. With one of our new "please be patient/student driver" magnets stuck to the car and "Dancing through Life" running through my head.

When I think of my life as a teenager, driving around with my boyfriend in his little red MG (he did the driving, not me), the song that comes to mind is "The Topical Song," a take-off on "The Logical Song" by Supertramp, even though it didn't come out until 1979 and my boyfriend and I were broken up by then.

When I was young, oh the gas was so plentiful,
bountiful, oh liberal, my tank was full
And all the pumps on the street, they would gurgle so happily
joyfully, playfully, filling me

The song goes on to describe the gas crisis of 1979 and the long lines, high prices, and general misery and loss of driving innocence it caused. 

Life is different now -- gas is always expensive, we know all about how bad gas-powered vehicles are for the environment, and many people in my neighborhood are driving electric cars. I'm sure I'll be driving a gas car for many years to come, though, possibly the rest of my driving life, because I don't see us being able to afford a new car ever again. But who knows? The future is always a mystery.

Dancing through life, swaying and sweeping
And always keeping cool
Life is fraught-less when you're thoughtless
Those who don't try never look foolish

It's really a terrible song, all about how you shouldn't take anything seriously, never take any risks, always take the easy way out, etc. But it's also a wonderful song, such an earworm, so happy. Maybe because I've always loved to dance.

Teenage life is very different for my kids than it was for me. Partly because of the pandemic and partly because of how social media/online computer games have changed how young people interact. In the summer, the twins sit all day long in front of their computers and play stupid computer games -- sometimes together, sometimes with online friends who they may or may not know in real life.

But maybe once they get their licenses (in a year), things will start to change. Maybe.

Dancing through life down at the Ozdust
If only because dust is what we come to
Nothing matters but knowing nothing matters
It's just life, so keep dancing through

So again, why does this song seem like the theme song to the twins learning to drive?

...Driving is a little like dancing, when you take off and go somewhere wild and new. 

...We played this CD a lot when the twins were little and we lived in Ridgecrest and drove endlessly, endlessly to get to anywhere.

...A driver's license is the key to a lot of things -- adult life, freedom. All they have so far are temporary permits, but the permanent permits will be coming in the mail soon, probably this week. That's a form of ID! They will have their photos on them, like real driver's licenses. Up until now, the only form of ID they've had is their student ID. This is a step beyond.

My darling babies are becoming real people. Not quite ready for that, but it's not really up to me, is it?

***

So, the week ahead. My book group is coming on Tuesday, so I have lots of cleaning plans for the next two days. Fortunately, we don't do full meals anymore, just snacks. We read a book set in England (The Dictionary of Lost Words by Pip Williams -- just awful, don't read it, such a waste of my time), so I'll have strawberries and cream, maybe I'll bake cookies, maybe some crackers or chips with dip. Iced tea and lemonade. That's enough.

Teen B and I both have orthodontia appointments, and otherwise I'll work on getting ready for our trip. There isn't much to do. I could research things to do in Yellowstone. I have a feeling we'll have vastly more to do there than we'll have time for.

Oh, and here and there, the twins and I can drive.

More lovely June

Having our lilac in bloom makes me so happy. This is without a doubt the best time of the year. Of course, to take this photo, I had to annoy the chickadee parents, because I got too close to their nest in a hole in the dead aspen. Just now, looking out the window, I saw a parent go to the nest with food in its mouth. I wonder how many babies there are and how soon they will fledge.

We've had some breaks from the rain, but no really hot weather yet, for which I am grateful. It's cloudy today, with an 80% chance of rain, so I am going to do a few errands before it starts to pour.

We need:

1. More leaf bags from Home Depot! Except for last Friday and Monday (when the boys were at Driver Ed), Teen A and I have gone out every weekday and hacked away at the junipers, weeds, etc. For compost pickup this past Friday, we put out 10 bags, the compost bin itself, and two piles of logs tied up with twine. (And look at that lush lawn -- that's with no artificial watering.)

There's an endless amount still to be done, though. The next two weeks, we should be able to work on 10 of the days, and since we're now sometimes filling two bags a day, we might have 15-20 bags to put out on June 23rd. Even so. The junipers, weeds, trees, bushes, and everything else are growing like crazy. We can never keep up. Still, I think about past summers when I filled zero leaf bags. This has got to be better than that. We will keep trying. And I will buy more and more leaf bags.

2. More shorts from Target! Teen A has outgrown last year's shorts, so I've bought him a few pairs, but he should have a few more. I do their laundry every three days, so he needs at least four pairs, preferably five, and he has only three. (Teen B grew, too, but not as much, and he inherited some old shorts from Teen A.) I'll also get some cat food, chips, take a look at the Barbie aisle, etc.

OK, now I'm back. I bought 30 leaf bags at Home Depot, but only one pair of shorts at Target, because I couldn't find the kind Teen A likes. I did however buy him a new light gray t-shirt (he only wears gray and black) and I found a very attractive Barbie outfit that I hadn't seen before, so I got that. And 14 cans of cat food, so we have enough to last us through the time that the cat-sitters will be here. Which reminds me -- we really need to plan that trip. I planned one version of it a week or so ago, but I've reconsidered -- I think it should be shorter and simpler. No Idaho portion, just Wyoming. So I should start making hotel reservations.

***

It was kind of a mixed week, despite the joy of the lilacs. The twins finished Driver Ed and both managed to pass the test for their permits. This week on Wednesday we'll go get those permits and then I plan to start driving with them on Thursday.

It occurred to me that driving for half an hour every day all summer may be a problem for two reasons: (1) that's a lot of gas! and (2) we have Ozone Action Days constantly, when you're supposed to limit driving. I guess I'll play it by ear. I'll consider the gas costs to be part of the price of raising kids, but obeying Ozone Action Days just goes along with living in Colorado. If we have a stretch of smoggy weather, we'll stay off the roads.

Another thing that happened last week had to do with my sleep apnea problem. The CPAP machine arrived last Friday, I think it was, June 2nd. That was when I was still very sick, so I opened the box, but didn't do anything with the contents. On Sunday I started looking at the instructions. Immediately I noticed things that no one had mentioned before, such as the requirement that I use it with distilled water, and the need to clean the device and replace some of its parts regularly -- according to what your insurance company is willing to pay for, which may not be the same as what the manufacturer thinks is best. Huh? Why didn't anyone tell me about that?

The instructions were complicated, and for a while I thought I might have to wait until Rocket Boy comes (not that he reads instructions, but usually between the two of us, with me reading and him interpreting, we can figure things out). Or maybe the company that provided the CPAP could help me. But I was struck by one thing: the instructions told me that the first thing I should do was download the app to my cell phone. App? What app? Why does my cell phone have to be involved?

So I got online and did some research. And I discovered an interesting thing. Because so few people use their CPAP machines the way they're supposed to, insurance companies have decided that they will only pay if people demonstrate that they are using the device correctly. The way this is done is the CPAP machine transmits its data to that app on your cell phone and from there to your insurance company. Not your doctor. I could live with it if it was my doctor. But no. The insurance company. If you don't use it for enough hours/nights, or if your apnea numbers aren't good enough, you are said to be "not in compliance" and the insurance company stops paying.

OK.

I know that for many people, this is nothing. Many people in the world today do everything via apps on their phones. Many people have given up on the silly idea of "privacy," and are willing to turn over all information about everything they do to private companies, the government, whoever.

And me, with my personal blog where I confess all sorts of private stuff to the world (not that the world is listening, mostly, just a few people), wouldn't you think I'd be willing to do that too?

It turns out that I'm not. Because when I realized what was required of me to be able to use the CPAP machine, I saw red. I stewed about it for a day or two, and then realized that I couldn't do it. Conveniently, the company called to ask whether I'd gotten the CPAP and how I was doing with it, so I told them that I was not OK with the cell phone requirement and where could I return the machine? They said I could bring it to their office in Louisville, so that afternoon (Tuesday) I dropped it off. Then I emailed the person I'd been seeing at the Colorado Sleep Institute and told him I'd returned the machine and why. He said something like, "Yeah, that's an issue for some people," and I thought, if you know that, why didn't you tell me about it before I spent $179 on a nonrefundable deposit?

There is an alternative to the CPAP machine, and that's an appliance you wear in your mouth. But, it has to be specially made to fit your mouth, and so I can't get one now -- because I have braces. The Colorado Sleep Institute guy said he would ping me every 6 months to see if I've gotten my braces off yet and then we can proceed with the mouth device. Maybe. I read that it's not recommended for "morbidly obese" people, and technically I am (because I lost an inch in height).

But what do I do in the meantime? 

I'm not going to drop dead from sleep apnea -- I think that's clear. The sleep study showed mainly hypopnea, not apnea. But it's still really not a good thing. Being tired and grumpy, memory problems, trouble concentrating, dementia (eventually). Oh yeah, I can't just ignore this.

Here are some things I could do that might help (gathered from various articles):

1. Not drink alcohol in the evenings. I don't drink alcohol EVER, so that's not an issue. I am trying not to consume anything after dinner, except water.
   
2. Take an antihistamine to keep my nasal passages clear. I take a generic Claritin quite often in the summer, so I've started making it part of my daily pill routine.
3. Lose weight. Sigh.
   
4. Get more exercise. Teen B has started his summer online PE class, and on Friday evening we speed-walked a mile. He's supposed to walk at least 10 miles a week, so if I do that with him, that'll be something.
5. Sew a little pocket on the back of all my nightgowns and put a tennis ball in it when I go to bed, so that I'll be disinclined to lie on my back. I'm considering this one. I always wake up on my back, and it seems likely that I'm waking up because of sleep apnea/hypopnea, not because it's time to wake up. Maybe the tennis ball would help.
   
6. Get my braces off! I'm 100% sure that my sleep problem has gotten worse since I got my braces. Maybe when they come off, the problem will improve a little.
   

Anyway, this whole CPAP debacle has been upsetting. If I'm being honest, I didn't want to use the CPAP machine in the first place. I had agreed to do it, and I planned to be good about it, but I wasn't happy. Finding out about the water and the cleaning and the tube replacement and having to argue with my health insurance company about it... that just made it worse. And then the cell phone stuff, and sending data to my health insurance company every morning... that broke the camel's back. But the camel was already carrying a load. 

Oh well.

Happy June.

Cruising into June

It's June! Another of my favorite months, along with May and October. June in Colorado can be a lot of different things: it can rain, it can snow, it can be very hot and dry. This year we're experiencing the first of those. It WILL NOT stop raining!

Of course, this is a good thing. We need to recharge those aquifers, fill the Colorado River, revitalize our trees. But it's unusual to have rain so many days in a row. Or if we do have days of rain, it doesn't usually rain in the morning. The storm clouds gather in the afternoon and then we have a nice, satisfying thunderstorm. But waking up to rain, day after day, is odd. And unpleasantly reminiscent of the terrible floods of 2013.

This isn't like 2013, not at all. Still, one never forgets.

I looked back at some old blog posts from previous Junes and found plenty of mentions of rain. Rain is normal for June, so I should stop fussing about it.

This June is starting out a little oddly in other ways though. First, I've been sick for a week now! I think I first felt the sore throat last Sunday, when we went to the Creek Festival. It was very bad on Monday and by Wednesday I was sneezing. Anyway, it's been awful. I hate being sick. When I'm healthy I think it might be nice to be sick -- could get a lot of sleep, not have to do things... well, this is nonsense. I still have to do everything when I'm sick. Who do I think would do the things, if not me? The kids absolutely, 100%, refuse to clean the litter boxes. I think if I were in the hospital they would feed the cats. They've done it once or twice when I was REALLY sick. But litter boxes, no. Rocket Boy will do the litter boxes if they're getting smelly, but Rocket Boy is in St. Louis. So really, there is nothing good about being sick.

The other odd thing about this June is that the kids are taking Driver Ed through TopCops. All day long for four days (Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday). Today is the third day of it, so I'm having a fairly peaceful Sunday. Still have to do all the things, but at least nobody (Teen A) is yelling at their computer game and nobody (Teen B) is yelling at the first nobody to shut up. On Friday, driving them all the way to the YMCA in Lafayette for class, I wondered if I could make it -- I was really too sick to drive. But I made it there and back, picked them up, took them there the next day... and this morning I realized I was finally starting to feel better. Not so out of it. I still have no energy, get out of breath very easily. But my brain is starting to clear.

Tomorrow (Monday) they will take the test for their permit and I hope and pray they pass it. Then next week, on June 14th, we have appointments at the DMV to get the actual permits (assuming they pass the test). And then we will start driving practice. Horrors. I plan to take one kid out for half an hour every day, alternating kids. So on the 15th maybe half an hour with Teen A, on the 16th half an hour with Teen B, etc., etc. After we've driven for a week or two, they will have some extended driving lessons with TopCops instructors. Then we will continue to practice, every day during the summer, and during the school year probably just on weekends, for a YEAR. No running off to the DMV on their 16th birthday. They have to have their permits for a YEAR before they can get their licenses. 

What a wonderful year this is going to be. Driving practice, and Year 2 of my braces. My braces should come off right before they get their licenses. And then life will get better? Maybe.

***

Being sick, Driver Ed, and the rain have combined to mess up my daily and weekly schedules, but it's OK. We'll get back on track soon. 

Teen A has been very enthusiastic about the yardwork project (because he gets $5 a day), and even on Wednesday and Thursday, when I was completely miserable, I went out with him and worked (and then came in and collapsed) because he wanted to. The last few days, fortunately, the twins have been with the TopCops and the yard has languished, wetly. The pile of junipers in this photo was the last thing we did on Thursday. Teen A's job is to saw off big branches, and in this case he did more than I would have liked -- but it would have had to come off eventually anyway, so it's fine. On Tuesday, when we go back to work, I think we'll spend our whole 30 minutes carving this into smaller pieces to fit into leaf bags. 

Or maybe we'll work in the back yard. We've been alternating between the front and back yards. Our tenant next door asked me about her overgrown junipers too, so we should probably be working in her yard as well. The responsibility for her yard has never been clearly delineated in the lease -- she's allowed to plant anything she wants, but while I think that means she should also take care of what's growing, she doesn't seem to think so. We can't really afford to hire a gardener on what she pays in rent, so I probably need to suck it up and be the gardener. With Teen A's help.

I shouldn't complain, shouldn't be so snippy. She's a good tenant and we like having her live there. I hate the thought of some other person living there. So we'll work on her junipers soon.

Other plans for June? Rocket Boy and I are trying to plan a trip for the end of the month, but it isn't going well. Neither of us seems to be able to get up the energy to do the work. He wants to go to Yellowstone, but so far I haven't figured out how we would do that. Lodging in the park is extremely expensive, but he thinks we could stay somewhere else -- maybe Cody? OK, let's see. We could drive to Cody in one day, then go to Yellowstone the next day, then Grand Teton the next day, and then, hmm, Craters of the Moon in Idaho looks interesting. OK, I guess I'm starting to see how this might work. Maybe. 

Other than a trip, my plans for June are pretty similar to my plans for May. Keep doing yardwork, keep doing FlyLady stuff, keep working on the files, and keep working on my writing. Make dinner most nights. Go for walks in the evenings, with or without kids. Right before I got sick, I tried to start a new habit of playing a board game in the evenings (after the walk). We did it exactly once and then I was too sick to do anything in the evening, a walk or a game or even dinner. So, starting tonight or tomorrow night (or maybe Tuesday night), I'll try to get that going again. We had a lot of fun the ONE night we did it (we played "Moose in the House," a perennial favorite). 

Oh, and enjoy the beauty that is June! My lilac bush! And the chickadees raising a family in the dead aspen next to it! And the flowers in my planters and in people's yards. And the warm sunshine/gentle rain.

OK, time to go pick up the twins

Reading post: Books from the white Ikea bookcase in my room

May has ended, time for another reading challenge update. In May my goal was to read unread books from the white Ikea bookcase in my bedroom. I pulled out 16 books (see photo) and decided to choose from the stack as the month went on. 

The stack was a bit intimidating, but I set to work on it. I pulled the first book off the top and just kept going. I'll describe them below in the order they appear in the photo, since that roughly corresponds to the order in which I read them.

1. The Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan (1678). I'd always wanted to read this, because Betsy & Tacy talk about it a lot. What surprised me is that it is so long (and a little dull, to be honest). I worked on it all month, here and there, and didn't finish it! So I'm keeping it, at least until I finish it, but probably permanently. (Post-note: I finally finished it on 12/29/23! Definitely keeping this.)
   
2. The Circular Staircase by Mary Roberts Rinehart (1908). I was sure I'd read this before, but couldn't find it on any list. I must have started it and put it down. It's a super mystery, with so many charming period details (and some less charming racism). According to Wikipedia, this book "pioneered what became known as the "had I but known" school of mystery writing." Despite some issues, I'm keeping it.
3. Justine by Lawrence Durrell (1957). I picked this up, somewhere, thinking it was a book I "should" read, or at least should have read. It's OK but has a very 50s feel. It's trying to be so sophisticated, all about sexual deviance and drugs, but the women are all less intelligent, less worthy, than the men. That is really how many people thought in those days, and it's so hard to swallow. I plan to leave this in a little free library.
4. Gigi and Selected Writings by Colette (1905 to 1949, collected 1963). Why hadn't I ever read this? To clarify, I'd read Gigi, but none of the other stories, novellas, and selections from novels in this volume. Colette was a wonderful writer -- I didn't realize. Maybe at some point I'll read more of her work. In any case, I'll keep this.
   
5. The Davidian Report by Dorothy Hughes (1952). I picked this up after reading Hughes' In a Lonely Place, but never read it -- it's a spy novel, and spy novels aren't really my thing. My loss -- it's great. I got somewhat confused about who was working for whom, but since it was obviously intended to be confusing, I forgave myself. This was fun and I'm keeping it as part of my little Hughes collection.
   
   
6. Killer in the Rain by Raymond Chandler (1935 to 1941, this collection 1964). This goofy book consists of eight short stories that Chandler later cannibalized into three of his novels: The Big Sleep, Farewell My Lovely, and The Lady in the Lake. If you love Chandler, as I do, it's amusing to read these stories and see what he did with them to create the novels. Like watching the writer at work. A keeper.
7. One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez (1967). I decided to hold on to this and read it when I do a Latin American literature year. It's back on the shelf for now.
   
8. Messer Marco Polo by Donn Byrne (1921). I had no recollection of reading this, but it's on my master list. I read it in July 1986, apparently. I looked through it -- it seems like a sweet old book. Maybe I'll read it again sometime. Keeping it for now.
9. The Tin Drum by Gunter Grass (1959). I decided to save this for when I do a German literature classics challenge. Back on the shelf.
   
10. Crying Out Loud by Jacky Gillott (1976). Many years ago someone gave me Gillott's first novel, Salvage, and I liked it, so I thought I'd like to read her other novels. Gillott died by suicide in 1980, and I have to say, Crying Out Loud reads like a suicide note. I'd tried it before -- this time I forced myself to push past the gruesome first chapter, but it didn't improve. I skimmed for a while and then said: "this is horrible." Off to Goodwill it goes.
11. Dawn Patrol by Don Winslow (2008). Back in 2012 I participated in an online book group (consisting mostly of me and the person running it) where we read beach-themed mystery novels (at least I think that's what we read -- hard to remember now). This was the last book on the list and I never got to it. The organizer told me it wasn't really worth reading, but I kept it all these years. She was right about it. I mean, it was pleasant, but not my style. I'm donating it.
    
    
12. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts by Les & Leslie Parrott (1995). Why do I have this? If I went to the trouble to buy it, why didn't I read it? Anyway, I've now read it. It's not a bad book, but it has a heavy Christian focus (e.g., it uses Mary and Joseph as an example of an engaged couple, and it claims that couples who pray together have better sex). That said, it's full of good advice, much of which I've read elsewhere. It's interesting to read a book like this many years into your marriage, to think about what you do right and what you could do better. I guess I'll keep it -- for now. It might leave the house in a later purge.
    
13. The Thief Taker by T. F. Banks (2001). This belonged to Clifford, our old next-door neighbor who died in 2009, and for that reason I've been superstitious about letting it go, even though it was an "advance reading copy" AND falling apart. I'm sure Clifford got it from a little free library. Anyway, I read it, it was mildly enjoyable, and it fell to pieces while I was reading it. So it's now in the recycling bin.
    
14. Klingsor's Last Summer by Hermann Hesse (1920). My parents gave me this when I was a teenager and I think I did read it -- it's not on my master list, but that's probably because the list began in 1980. So I set it aside to be (re)read when I do a year of German lit.
    
15. Finding Kate by Maryanne Fantalis (2017). I used to teach with the author, so I bought her book and she signed it. Thing is, I have zero interest in romance literature, even romance literature based on a Shakespeare play, so I've never gotten past the first chapter -- including this time. I put it in the Goodwill pile, but then I took it out again and put it back on the shelf. Call it superstition, call it whatever, apparently I have to keep it. For now.
    
16. The Mary Roberts Rinehart Crime Book (1957). This consists of three of her novels (The Door, The Confession, and The Red Lamp). They were fun, but not really fun enough, not as much fun as The Circular Staircase. Her style gets tiresome after a while and many of her books drag on too long. So I'm sending this off to Goodwill, giving someone else the chance to find out that "the butler did it." 
    

So that's the lot of them. I managed to read nine and get rid of five.

In June we move on to the next bookcase in my bedroom (a teak one), which has most of the rest of my fiction collection. It also has a dollhouse and lots of Barbies, but behind the Barbies there are lots of books, too. The curving teak bookcase next to it has mostly photo albums (and Barbie dolls), so I'm not going to worry about it.

Doing this project has really made me want to reorganize these shelves, so I've been working on that for the past few days (while also fighting a bad cold -- possibly the two things are related). First I decided to arrange my older books chronologically, from the 1500s to around 1950. Older books are just so different from modern books. It was a little hard to set that up, because I wanted to keep all of one author's books together, and some authors wrote for several decades (Faulkner, for example). But it works pretty well.

Then I experimented with having a Black American authors section, a Native American authors section, etc., but that didn't feel right. It felt inappropriately segregated. So I integrated them into the rest of my books, but I did set up a modern foreign authors section, divided by continent: Latin American, Asian, African, European (but not British). Then I realized the books still didn't feel right, so I pulled out modern books by Canadian authors, Australian authors, and British authors too.

I may or may not keep the new arrangement. But it's so interesting the way certain writing themes pop out when you arrange by nationality (not race). When I have just American books together, the racial themes become so strong, and also the western themes: western expansion, life in the west (of course, this may also reflect my interests). Those themes get muted when the British books are mixed in with them. The British authors have different concerns. The Canadian authors are similar to the US authors, but yet have a different feel as well. I think I'll understand my collection better, arranged like this. I don't know. I'll try it this way for a while and see if I like it.

Moving on to June, we have another month of (mostly) fiction. I found some unread books in the teak bookcase (before I reorganized), though not as many as in the Ikea bookcase. I decided to skip some partially-read collections, set a few books aside for later reading projects, and ended up with seven books in all (see photo). 

They are all novels except for Cheyenne Autumn. I don't know if I'll get through all of them, but we'll see. Some of these have been on my shelves for a LONG time. Interestingly, if I had reorganized my bookcases before I started this project, all of these books would have been in the Ikea bookcase, because they're older (or Japanese, in the case of Black Rain). 

Starting in July I'm going to read books from other parts of the house (dining room, living room, desk room, kids' room), so there will be more nonfiction. But I'm getting ahead of myself. Time to focus on this group. I've already started reading Frankenstein.